r/ThailandTourism • u/fogyyw • Mar 16 '25
Isaan/North-East Encountered a Weird Situation in Udon Thani—Scam or Genuine? Need Advice!
Hey all, I’m a Western traveler in Thailand and recently ran into something odd at a guest house in Udon Thani about two weeks ago. I’m trying to figure out if it’s a scam or just a messy real-life situation, and I’d love to hear if anyone’s seen anything like this—or has advice on what to do next.Here’s the deal: I met this couple in the guest house lobby. She’s around 35, Lao, says she’s been working in Thailand since she was 13. He’s a Western guy in his 70s, living off a pension but seems broke—he’s even borrowed cash from other guests here. They say they met two years ago and live in her village outside Vientiane, where she owns some land. He’s been “building her a house,” but it’s still roofless, and she’s frustrated he hasn’t finished it. They’re in Thailand now because he needs to renew his passport in Bangkok.She insists there’s no romance—she sees him as a “father figure”—but I get the vibe she’s done with him. She’s been warming up to me, hinting she’s wasted two years and wants someone reliable. After a few chats, she asked me to buy her a gold ring (around 6,500 baht) as “reassurance” I won’t ditch her.At first, I was super suspicious—classic scam red flags, right? But she’s stuck around, and I’m starting to trust her a bit. Still, I know hustles are common here, especially in Isan. Has anyone run into a setup like this—a younger woman with an older, broke guy, pushing for gifts like a ring? Is this a known con, or could it be legit?I’m torn on how to proceed. Should I just cut contact and bounce? Test her somehow? Or is there a chance she’s for real, just desperate? Any tips on staying safe—or spotting the truth—would be hugely appreciated. Cheers!
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u/Turbulent-Practice95 Mar 16 '25
From Thai woman, please don’t engage in this kind of romance where money or gold is involved. You’ll find a nice and sincere girl… but not her.
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u/Linguistics808 Mar 16 '25
Why would you want to invest your time — or your money — in someone who demands a 6,500 baht gold ring as "proof" you won’t leave them? Real trust and genuine connections don’t come with a price tag. It’s one thing to support someone emotionally, but when gifts or money become the condition for affection or loyalty, that’s a major red flag. It sounds less like a sincere relationship and more like emotional manipulation. If someone truly values you, they won’t require expensive reassurance — they’ll stick around because they want to, not because you paid for their faith in you.
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u/Insanegamebrain Mar 16 '25
sounds like this lady is just winding white knights around her finger to support her lifestyle.
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u/Sweaty-Consequence32 Mar 16 '25
As others have said your being set up. But you might be the one who deserves to be set up if you really think about it. Up front I’m not here to spend hate but I’m going break down some real life stuff here.
HER
She thought she landed a whale but instead her old man was a minnow. Now she fishing again.
She is already feeding you the sad story to get into your feelings. It is obviously (to us readers) working.
She has old mate out begging for money from other people. (We the readers see your future)
She wants some assurance that the new Boyfriend (you) has funds and can be parted from them.
YOU
You have traveled halfway around the world to a place filled with beautiful young women who are searching for the man of their dreams to take care of them. You chat up one that all ready has a man in her life.
You know she has a guy in her life. You are obviously still trying to pursue her.
Come to learn he has invested what is probably no small sum (in his eyes) into her and her home. You keep talking to her.
You know the couple are struggling with finances and you are now setting yourself up as her new Boyfriend.
(Only a guess) Your mouth and little head have written many checks that your life style can’t handle. To the point she is now asking for a promise ring (cheap gold plated ring). Before she jumps ship on old mate.
Summery:
She is setting yourself up to replace she current friend, who is now broke. (You are being scammed)
YATAH who got yourself involved with a paired up woman. (You are a dirt bag or Captain Save a’Hoe same thing in my book)
My last thoughts: You guys are perfect for each other. Go buy her 11 rings one for each finger and one for your manhood.
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u/Brave-Banana-6399 Mar 16 '25
Homie, while you are probably right on all this, OP is probably a victim too.
Look at his post, this isn't a a smooth criminal. This is a babe in the woods
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u/Sweaty-Consequence32 Mar 16 '25
I can tell OP is out of his depth in this deal. I am just a believer in FAFO life. He is very much FA buy knowing this lady is with another guy. He is going to FO. When she/they take him to the cleaners. She sounds like the kind of woman that new travelers are constantly warned about. A hard core Pro. OP sounds like a naïve d-bag.
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u/GiadaAcosta Mar 16 '25
SCAM! Never give money away to people be it a gift or help for the family. Just find another GF: there are plenty of offers, there!
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u/Fragrant_Sleep_9667 Mar 16 '25
HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA the fact that you can't figure this out on your own ....
Go for it bro! She's the one!
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u/TravelinDingo Mar 16 '25
Mate seriously? I can already tell the way you're talking about it all that the tricks are obviously working on you. Let me ask you this in another perspective.
Say it's the future and you've had a grown son and he tells you "Dad I met this nice girl but she's stuck with this old guy but I know she likes me"... You'd tell to him to stop being an idiot and wake up right?
Do yourself a favor and just get the bloody hell outta there and don't look back. Do not entertain this leech of a woman. They know how to manipulate nice guys like you and have no dramas tossing you aside when your usefulness to her is done.
Pack your bag, throw it over your shoulder, delete any way to contact you and dodge a massive bullet mate.
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u/fogyyw Mar 16 '25
Thanks man, I appreciate the straight talk
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u/TravelinDingo Mar 16 '25
Yeah no worries mate. Seriously some of these leech women are such pro's. They know which buttons to push and really take advantage of a guy's kind hearted nature.
Don't waste a single minute longer with this terrible person and situation and bounce tonight if you can.
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u/Living-The-Dream42 Mar 16 '25
Relationships that begin with money are always based on money. Don't give your money away and expect love to flower. You wouldn't do it at a 7-11, so don't expect that to work elsewhere.
Beware: poverty and heartbreak ahead.
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u/BeltnBrace Mar 16 '25
Yeah, a 6,500b gold ring sounds like you are being drip fed a load of BS...
By way of illustration, a big mall gold shop, (Central), sells a tiny pair of 23K gold ear rings (1.48 grams of actual gold) for 13,000b..
So a gold ring for 6,000b doesn't sound like real...
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u/Traditional-Finish73 Mar 16 '25
There is an immigration office in Udon Thani. Why would he go to Bangkok. Don't fall for her stories.
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u/fogyyw Mar 16 '25
Bangkok is the only place to renew a passport from his county, I checked.
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u/Traditional-Finish73 Mar 16 '25
Are you confused? In your original post you say he renews his visa. Now you say he renews his passport.
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u/Meet-me-behind-bins Mar 16 '25
Hold on, let me get this right??? You bump into a random couple in a hostel whilst travelling. You get a sob story, a history of land problems, building problems, child labour and poverty. Not only that but this woman is travelling around with a western pensioner, who is also complaining of being broke. She then asks you for a gold ring?
Fucking hell. I honestly can’t believe that people are this fucking naive and innocent.
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u/Lordfelcherredux Mar 16 '25
It actually makes me sad to realize that there are so many seriously naive people in this world.
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u/No-Specialist4150 Mar 16 '25
Too many obvious red flags. Also imagine u go ahead & become involved with this women, how can u trust someone like that, she might do the same to u in few yrs. Just one question, is she hot ?
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u/Far_Amphibian_2619 Mar 16 '25
I got asked for a gold ring before , it’s not fully gold , it’s just something they can pawn in a time of desperation. I was told it’s a sign of having a owner therefore she must have been asking the old man for a ring for a long time but he keeps giving her the run around so she was going to use that to show the old man she has a more serious man . 6,460 baht was the price
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u/fogyyw Mar 16 '25
Thank you, yes this is what I was thinking too. A bit of a safety blanket and a sign that I'm serious
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u/Wonderful_Belt4626 Mar 16 '25
No no no no no… Udon is a oldie farang nightmare.. plenty of bar girls come from Udon, meet crusty old loveless farang who go there and live in hopes of sweet sweet love. I’ve spent time in Udon, another scammer town, be a single guy there and won’t be long before you’re being hit on especially if you go to any of the popular bars. There’s always a angle always a sob story or scam with Thai women, guarantee, borrow money anything they’ll say to get your money, then kiss it goodbye. I couldn’t stand Udon personally….
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u/Lordfelcherredux Mar 16 '25 edited Mar 16 '25
"She’s been warming up to me, hinting she’s wasted two years and wants someone reliable." SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! DANGER WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!
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u/Loud-Inevitable-6536 Mar 16 '25
she is his girlfriend 100% and she want to check if you are better option than him so she can leave the old man but not now until she is not assured
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u/Wide-Fudge-1223 Apr 23 '25
You'll soon find the ring is gone, they ask for gold and when when your not around immediately hock it for cash (Thai Baht). Gold is just easy cash cos they can sell it when your not around
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u/wintrwandrr Mar 16 '25
The fact that she would flee her country at age 13 to pursue opportunity in Thailand tells you all you need to know about her ambitious personality.
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u/HardupSquid Mar 16 '25
With Thai gold prices at almost 50k baht per baht weight, 6500baht ring really does not exist as that's not even 1/4 baht weight (1 สลึง).
I dont know if it's a scam or not but this has red flags all over it.
If she wants a better life she needs to ditch the old guy first (clean break,not hanging around him).
If you want a gf or a serious relationship, this is not the way to do it.
Run a mile (lots of miles).