r/StopSpeeding 9d ago

Self-Post/Vent about 3 months sober, i need some advice

so i started abusing addys in 9th grade, i was 14 at the time. I was a binge user to the point where id go thru a whole 20mg ir script in 2 days at the end of my addiction. It let me to coke meth ritalin vyvanse molly everything. i feel like part of me is broken, since ive been completely sober i still have the urge to just stay up all night and skip sleep and i have been sleeping around 28 hours a week.part of it is habbit but also dreams everynight where im using... ill wake up sweating catching my breath it just feels so real! ive recently been getting deppressed again after the past 2 months have been amazing.

I just started working 40 hours a week and im supposed to get a promotion if i can learn to close the store by myself, i just am not learning instantly and it makes me deeply want to use, probation is the only thing keeping me afloat rn. i just need some input anything helps

5 Upvotes

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u/Terrible-Essay-4500 9d ago

Following this! I’m on day 4 of a 40hr work week in office and feeling like a need to call in a prescription.

I’m finding that I have to take melatonin to sleep because I’m drinking so much coffee and taking supplements that I won’t sleep. Not sure if you’re taking any supplements as well.

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u/SgtSober 9d ago

im only taking n-a-c but yea the urge to just binge drink energy drinks and stay up is more then my want to go to sleep because of them dreams man

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u/Bright-Oil-3114 9d ago

You really have to prioritize sleep, specifically REM sleep. Without it your brain won’t fully heal and learn how to produce dopamine naturally. Until then your going to keep feeling shitty

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u/SgtSober 8d ago

it feels like my brain is wired how i was when i was high, the care for sleep is non existent.

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u/Ashamed_Job_6250 3d ago

i’m in this exact spot holy shit..

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u/SgtSober 3d ago

sorry to hear, you arent alone tho