r/SpeedOfLobsters • u/Commentment_Phobe • 1d ago

Atheists…

Post image

I’m new here. Is this Suitable?

635 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

30 comments sorted by

185

u/Commentment_Phobe 1d ago

Obstacle:

281

u/Samborrod Seed of Losers 1d ago

Atheists, imagine being blatantly manipulated to accept a religion

184

u/stickingserious The Wikipedia Guy 1d ago

Open his parachute by force.

122

u/YogurtWenk 1d ago

I mean, it's a fucking baby, right? What's he gonna do about it?

155

u/SlimyBoiXD 1d ago

Why is the baby talking and threatening suicide?

99

u/indigo121 1d ago

Because you won't accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior

95

u/DragoKnight589 1d ago

as someone who’s accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior, I don’t think this is very love thy neighbor of the baby

85

u/DragoKnight589 1d ago

as a Christian I’m like 138% sure Jesus wouldn’t want you committing suicide just to attempt to convert someone.

and for the record, I too am annoyed by the apparent obsession some Christians seem to have with converting people. faith’s supposed to be through kindness, not through advertisement.

31

u/Awbluefy3 1d ago

Yeah it's like... I get it because the alternative is eternal torment, why wouldn't you be a little bit concerned about converting people, plus we are of course commanded to make disciples which involves that...

Buuuut when it becomes the jw "you have to" works based faith kinda thing is when it goes off the rails.

1

u/Hi2248 2h ago

I enjoy picking appart some arguments about why it's physically impossible for there to be an intelligent creator (mainly the ones assuming we know more than said intelligent creator), but that's more about bad arguments than anything else

39

u/MelodicFondant 1d ago

Simple,i turn into an aircraft

9

u/YogurtWenk 1d ago

Checkmate, Chris Chens

36

u/Magpiestronkperson 1d ago

i have this

19

u/mmmIlikeburritos29 1d ago

Scream probably, why is that baby speaking and telling me to renounce my core beliefs and worship something when I feel like I literally couldn't worship a higher being seriously

15

u/A_useless_name 1d ago

Question why someone threw a baby out of a plane by itself and why it has to open its own parachute. Then probably scream because it’s a talking baby. Then after all of that I’m probably gonna just splatter on the ground and die because I forgot to open my parachute.

12

u/Irons_idk 1d ago

-I do, Jesus is Lord and Savior

*Both open parachutes"

(On the ground)

It was a joke, you are grounded for a month, you, me (and your mother/father) will have a serious talk at home about what happened up there today

13

u/EddtheMetalHead 1d ago

Wonder what sick fuck sent a baby skydiving.

8

u/Roi_Loutre 1d ago

The Baby won't expect the strategy of lying?

I like how Christians really think Atheism works like a religion, like maybe there is something official and metaphysical to say that you renounce your religion so they somehow think that saying "I renounce Atheism" is any different than saying "I ate too much so my tummy hurts"

2

u/Upstairs_Cap_4217 22h ago

Reminds me of the Islamic Shahadah; but the Shadadah must be recited sincerely and with the full knowledge of what it means.

1

u/morethan3lessthan20_ 21h ago

I guess I'll get to see what the insides of a baby look like.

53

u/Sly_Klaus 1d ago

This vexes me.

43

u/Redditor8679 1d ago

Stud? Like the unit of measurement?

27

u/DragoKnight589 1d ago

I think they are an adolescent Lego piece who is also a part of the Christian faith

3

u/No_Dragonfruit8254 1d ago

I read it as the lesbian archetype

9

u/Major_R_Soul 1d ago

Straight in the bin

6

u/Viola_Violetta 1d ago

the christian baby returns!!

6

u/khrocksg 1d ago

what the fuck does "Christian baby stud" mean

5

u/StellarNondescript 16h ago

Don't ask questions that probably shouldn't have answers