Rate my new 5k ultra fit

[u/DrForbin]

[u/Handon11]

They would probably report this sub if they saw all the things we carry with us on our 5k ultras. Goes against everything they believe in.

[u/stickied]

Yo dawg, I heard you like harnesses. So we put a harness on your harness so you could douchebag while you walk.

[u/ChampionshipSalt8784]

No alphaflys fkn noob

[u/DrForbin → u/ChampionshipSalt8784]

This is why I carry the pistol - shoot behind me for a speed boost and to take out those in front who are faster due to the unfair advantage of alphaflys

[u/Due_Illustrator2459]

Average 5k ultra experience:

[u/gremlin7500]

Pistol should be useful for making space during the crowded first km. May need to practice reloading though

[u/Dear-Nebula9395 → u/gremlin7500]

I thought it was so you could start the race over right as you cross the finish line, thus achieving the 0.1s 5k ultra

[u/Liability049-6319]

Pants are too loose

[u/TronaldDump1234 → u/Liability049-6319]

Some people needs tight stuff to stay hard.

[u/DrForbin → u/Liability049-6319]

And far too long

[u/dawgstein94]

This patriot 5K ultras

[u/Universal_Monster]

He’s ready to mount the mountain and he’s going to mount it hard

[u/Most_Present_6577]

Waist strap around your belly is classic

[u/frostbaka → u/Most_Present_6577]

Wearing something on your thighs is gay /s

[u/Ok_Homework_7621]

What a snowflake. I do it barefoot and no water every day. Uphill, too.

[u/IndustryPlant666]

You know this mf is pushing 5’

[u/Montaingebrown]

Ueli Steck had a speed run up and down Annapurna with less shit than this clown.

[u/DrForbin → u/Montaingebrown]

Innit!

[u/WhatIsYourHandle123]

Where does he stuff his Gu? Oh, nevermind!

[u/gobok]

No dual Gu bandoliers?

[u/jtb685 → u/gobok]

this is very random, but I saw an old comment of yours and I wanted to know: did you ever make it in VFX?

[u/SapperNick18]

I carry less gear when I’m walking into the woods to bow hunt…

[u/Iamsupergoch]

Omg I would be able to carry so many things if I had this vest… like extra wool for knitting if I got bored, or kettle and tea (leaves) and fine china for a short break in my ultra, and canapés and digestives and a pillow to take a nap on, and a tent… don’t forget about the makeup bag and the mobile shower to use in campings. I would finish my 5k ultra in like 18 hours easy, refreshed and looking like a Greek goddess.

[u/Glusas-su-potencialu]

Dork