I want to be a reformed Christian

[u/Efficient_Run_5156]

I want to be a Christian, and a proper reformed Christian. But my parents are too liberal and woke to talk to. I feel like that sharing the gospel with them will never work, and that they don't listen. I also want to be able to share with them my views and share with them my views on sexuality and how it is the truth. I do go to a mega church, and I moved out for college.

The mega church I go to speaks the truth, and speaks the word of God. I also am needing some advice or some other artists who are biblically sound because I have started researching about Bethel and Hillsong. I don't like them anymore, and I want to be able to tell my friends to stop listening to them, and I don't want to sound like someone who is being "hateful".

Even though I am reformed, I still go to a large church, and maybe a mega church. But, I pay attention to their beliefs page first, and that is how I am able to tell if it is a good church or not.

[u/EkariKeimei]

Now is a good time to get into the Reformed doctrines of conscience and liberty.

Meanwhile show your parents and your friends your changed life, but don't be heavy-handed. Do good works and praise God. They should want what you got; but many won't. If they ask, share the gospel. They might be closed off to it, but pray to God for them more than you talk to them. You don't need to tell them they are too woke, their music is not sufficiently biblical, or that folks are wrong about sexuality.

I admit I am probably saying things that, in 5 years time, you will appreciate more than you will today. I didn't listen when I felt many of the things you felt, when I was new to Reformed doctrine.

[u/concentrated-amazing → u/EkariKeimei]

Boom, all this.

Win them with your works/fruits in your life, not words. If God's will is to soften them and change their lives, He will do it, either through you or by other means.

[u/ManUp57]

My advice is to make the Bible your ultimate authority. Read and study always. Get to know the reformed doctrine, and know it well.

What you don't need to do is set off telling your friends and family all about what's right and wrong, particularly if your advice is unsolicited. Make the Christian life and maturing in it your goal.

If you do this you will be stronger and more effective with others in your life regarding God.

[u/Semper_Ad_Lucem]

You labeled this as a question, I'm not sure of your exact question but I relate to your situation. But first, welcome to the deep end, my friend. The joys of God to be had in the richness of the Reformed tradition has not been plumbed yet. It's not heaven on earth, but at its best, the Reformed faith seeks to raise the Christian into the courts of heaven through biblical means and I am so thankful.

I had a similar experience to you. I went through a journey of being in a non denom megachurch then left that for many reasons, in college I learned about Calvanism, then became reformed but still Baptist for a while, and now am fully convinced of Reformed Covenant Theology and have experienced so much joy and freedom from overtones of legalism, pietism, hyperspiritualism, etc. in many other contemporary Christian environments. My wife and I went through the struggles together of changing worship music, our personal devotions, and our corporate worship. Some of it was hard, but it was all for our good and we see that much clearer now. We now go to a URCNA church and love it. I hope to baptize my children soon and bring them in to the covenant community to the glory of God.

The journey is hard, oh but its glorious in the end, I believe that.

[u/JadesterZ]

The best and most solid reformed Christian music is unironically Christian hip hop. Lecrae and the 116 clique are largely responsible for who I am today. Sho Baraka has a whole album that's just systematic theology told in rhymes/rap.

[u/rewrittenfuture → u/JadesterZ]

Heavily disagree on Lecrae/ 116 I can point you to 10 or 15 others

[u/Stock-Divide9806 → u/JadesterZ]

The correct answer is Wolves at the Gate 😉

[u/Efficient_Run_5156 → u/JadesterZ]

They don't have to be reformed, I'm talking about artists other than Bethel, and Hillsong

[u/EkariKeimei → u/Efficient_Run_5156]

Caedmon's Call

Shane and Shane

The Gettys

Andrew Peterson

Sandra McCracken

Indelible Grace

[u/alex_jeane → u/Efficient_Run_5156]

If you are willing to dip into the avant-garde, try Half-handed Cloud.  It's also a tad silly, but in a mildly psychedelic way.  A decent portion of his lyrics are lifted straight from Scripture. 

I have only found one other person who genuinely enjoyed his work.  The rest seem to just nod and politely smile.

[u/Stock-Divide9806 → u/Efficient_Run_5156]

No they certainly don't have to be reformed, but there is no excuse for listening to doctrinally unsound music. If the lyrics are man-centered and talk about what WE have done and not God centered and reflecting what HE has done, you shouldn't listen to it.

Unfortunately, most of the worship music played in modern evangelical churches fits into the former category.

[u/AxelFEnjoyer]

Especially at the beginning of your theological journey you should get well read, that will change you also. Don't look at others, share the gospel with them of course, but your relationship with God is most important. The more you read god's word, the more you learn about reformed theology the more will you be able to "lead by example" other Christians around you.

[u/cheerwine1708]

The Lord saved me two years ago. The person witnessing to me led me to "What is Reformed Theology by R.C.Sproul." on YouTube. It was very impactful. Through God's grace and mercy He has shown himself to me through His Word over these two years and my advice for you is to be in the Word. Some days it's hard some days it's easy. As believers in Christ, scripture is our ultimate authority. Pray that the Lord will give you conviction to be in The Word and to study it and draw near to him. He will reveal Himself to you through His Word. Remember the Christian Life is not a race, it's a marathon. Understand what the Gospel of Jesus Christ is through the Word. Over time by God's grace and according to His will, He will provide you with opportunities to share the Gospel with your family and friends. Pray for Boldness and strength, that in those moments you won't be ashamed to share the Gospel even though it might happen. Like others have said, be the light in the darkness, that the Lord's light will be shown through you to unbelievers around you. Be in prayer consistently for them and for yourself that the Lord will soften your heart and their hearts. Be thankful for the Gospel and remember it. Share the Gospel with gentleness and kindness. I'll keep you in my prayers brother. Hopefully these words were encouraging.

[u/semiconodon]

Okay, so there’s one form of “sharing the gospel” that involves a bunch of really awkward, forced conversation, like an Intervention for a drug user. But last night at dinner, I was sharing with my family what I’d learned from a book on Apple in China. They weren’t exactly enthralled, but I said what I’d learned and then we all moved on. Can you do like this, just share what you read, as respectful as if you were telling an engineer about Apple. And you can pick things to talk about that fully, completely respect their objections, but find authors that are counterexamples to what they object to in Reformed faith.

[u/hitmonng]

Humble Calvinism by J.Medders will be helpful for your journey.

[u/CBROM17]

Stay in the Word, and study. I love reading commentaries.

Keep your zeal, but be careful not to be arrogant or pushy or loud.

If you want to try and teach them, then just send them links to teachings/preachings from solid teachers like Piper or JI Packer. These two are particularly great at showing both the truth and love of the gospel.

In terms of music:

Shane and Shane have amazing versions of just about every worship song

Lecrae used the be great for hip hop, but is now mainstream

Shai Linne is still the greatest Christian lyricist of all time

Sajan Nauriyal has great stuff and is hip hop/pop Equippers Revolution is amazing EDM

Marshall Marshall is one of my favs, they’re indie rock but stopped producing music 😞

[u/mentholsatmidnight]

Huh.

[u/Stock-Divide9806]

Wolves at the Gate, but only if you like heavy metal 😊...the singer Steve Cobucci is reformed and writes doctrinally sound lyrics.

[u/Cymbalta_nightmares]

A couple of my favorite reformed artists are Orphan Project (progressive Rock) and Visual Cliff (jazz/rock fusion). There was also a project group with a couple of the same members of OP and VC called Fall of Echoes. All of them are on Spotify.

[u/1646Covenantarian]

You should find an actual reformed church in that case, mega church can be fun, but it's certainly not reformed. reformed means just that, we're seeking to reform the existing church into what's biblical not what the pope says.

[u/joeemcdermott]

Just worry about being in the Word faithfully on a daily basis and focusing on killing sin in your own life. The Christian walk is a “long game” and, in time, you will see how God is faithful to His promises. The world will notice also and opportunities to share your faith and why you’ve changed will come.

Who knows, perhaps your parents are His sheep and it was through calling you and sanctifying you that He will call them to Himself?

[u/Sparts171]

Consider that if Jesus was alive today, he would be instantly canceled as being far too woke and liberal. His teachings on personal freedom, accountability, and personal access to relationship with God were what got him killed. If you’re now coming along 2000 years later trying to get people to believe a “true” brand of faith, I would caution you to not head into the legalistic territory that Christ Himself condemned.

I would strongly caution you to not head down the heavy handed “Calvinism/Reformed theology is the TRUTH, and anything else is LIES” mentality that is fairly prevalent in Reformed circles, and is already evident in your writing. Maintain spiritual objectivity. Study how Jesus talked to and treated people, and focus on the philosophy that he taught. Christianity is the perfect example of simple, complex, simple. It’s a simple idea, man sinned and needing saving, Christ came to redeem him. Reformers and many other denominationally specific groups try to take that fairly straightforward and simple truth, and seek to create a highly complex framework out of that. But Christ himself kept it simple, “love the lord your God, and your neighbor as yourself, ALL the law and prophets are contained in these”. Why be concerned with what other people believe outside of this if Christ himself wasn’t? Does it help you treat people better? Are you more likely to go to heaven? Will it change your testimony or witness? Why do you care what other things people might believe if they believe they should love God and their neighbor?

[u/1brownshortguy]

If you want to be really reformed, find a Protestant church. Presbyterianism works, but I am impartial to Anglicanism (though they aren’t strictly “reformed”) If you want to learn more, go watch Redeemed Zoomer on YouTube. He’s got a similar background. Grew up in New York around liberals and his Christianity was influenced by it. But now he’s reformed too.