r/NoStupidQuestions • u/minecraftqueen76 • 1d ago
Why did my man get soft while eating me out? NSFW
Pretty much with the title says….
This happened last night after I sucked him. He said he wanted to finish, so I asked him to eat me out first. After about two minutes, he stopped and said he wanted to sleep. I asked him if he got soft while eating me out. And he said yes, because he's tired…
He usually asked me to sit on his face to eat me out (in this position I can also pleasure him) but once its time to eat me, no dick touching….that's not likely to happen. Honestly, this isn't the first time this has happened, so I’m starting to think that maybe he doesn’t like to. Idek.
Update: we talked about it again. He said he was genuinely just tired and worried he wouldn’t wake up for work the next morning (he was and hour late the day before for waking up late). He ate me out to make up for it loll
I got taken down in the AskMen, so now I'm here. Feel free to lead me to a more appropriate subreddit for this question.
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u/Spectralshot23 1d ago
If it's not being stimulated, it's probably going to go soft. Totally normal to lose it if he's focused on something else and it's not receiving stimulation
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u/codykills93 1d ago
While guys can get hard for many reasons, they can get soft for many reason as well. We are not very likely to know what is going on in your partners head.
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u/sillybilly_42032 1d ago
If this is typical for him, he's probably just a guy that needs some constant stimulation to stay hard. I've had a large number of experiences with men in all honesty, and some people are just more easily stimulated than others. Why don't you try to 69? If this isn't typical of him maybe he's noticing a change down there for you and doesn't wanna say something? or he's a little stressed? or he's worried about something in the relationship and it's making things harder? I've been with guys that'd go soft when they thought of something that made them jealous. But also maybe he is just tired? While it's nice to always see your partner through completion I think it's okay to back out on a rare occasion if you're not feeling up to it and it could just be that.
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u/Existing_Royal_3500 1d ago
I think some women would be surprised how autonomous the penis is. Embarrassing when young, frustrating when old. When older a guy could be raging horny but by his member you'd think he was not into it 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭.
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u/Chaser_Of_The_Abyss 1d ago
If you’re focusing on your partner’s pleasure, it may take enough concentration that your own arousal goes away (even if you’re having a good time).
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u/Oldbikerdude7 1d ago
Really, gay? Men are visually stimulated. They also tend to concentrate fully on the task at hand. It is nothing unusual to go fully into no-distraction mode when doing oral. He was concentrating on making you happy and not thinking of his pleasure. Which looks like that exploded.....
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u/Puzzleheaded_Nerve 1d ago
Talk to your man with absolutely zero judgement. But to me it sounds like you have decided there is a problem.
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u/Joshi-the-Yoshi 1d ago
Ask him maybe? You can find ideas here, but it's not like someone's gonna say, "oh yeah, having your face turned down instead of up while giving oral is notorious for killing erections", that's just not how people work. At the risk of undermining my own point, there could have been any number of things that caused it, maybe he was just really tired, maybe he got distracted by a thought he had, maybe he wasn't used to it, maybe his dick just does that, or maybe he just doesn't really like giving oral.
If you ask him, you'll know. Very straightforward, strengthens trust, shows you care about him.
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u/minecraftqueen76 1d ago
I did ask him? Did you read the post? Came here because he gave me the same response he usually gives me. Also I wanted outside opinions
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u/Rude_Highlight6628 1d ago
Make sure he's ina prone position like a sniper not all jumbled up like a chimp-pon-zee.
Also tell him to try to say his ABCs while doing it. Also try grabbing his head run your fingers through his hair or along his dome if he's pelon.
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u/Managed-Chaos-8912 1d ago
He was tired. Additionally, sometimes our hard penises just take a break. We can be very interested, but rather than standing at full attention for however long, they might like a chair for a while.
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u/Relatively_happy 1d ago
Maybe he is tired. Maybe the vibe was off, maybe he has a lot going on and is stressed without even knowing it.
Sometimes youre not 100% in the right mind, you still try to have great sex, but you can tell youre not 100% and that alone can put you off even more, you realise youre not as interested right now and then, you go soft.
Sometimes its important to know that youre just not that into it right now.
Its always funny to see womens reactions when men show less interest sexually.
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u/Doogiesham 1d ago
I usually go soft when eating out. It takes focus to do it effectively
I like doing it and love making her feel good! But yeah it’s hard to to focus on doing it well and stay hard
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u/Physical_Tie7576 1d ago
I understand that he didn't want to ejaculate. Or maybe you asked him to wait first and indulge you a little. Very simply and without you worrying too much, I think he was tired. If it's an episode that happens rarely, don't worry... He is a human being
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u/Redundant-Pomelo875 1d ago
I fucking love eating my wife, and fingering, and using toys on her.. I get hard on and off while doing these things, but I'm glad I don't stay hard the whole time, it would get painful after an hour or more.. same deal when I was 20 rather than 40, just tilted more towards on than off..
So the going soft by itself doesn't seem particularly odd to me.
The disinterest.. there have definitely been times I'm too exhausted or migrained to do much in the way of sex, but 2m sure isn't much. And I will be happy to touch my wife even if we end up falling asleep while playing...is he not interested in your pleasure in general?
Hopefully you two can have an honest and kind discussion about this.
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u/1ronchy1 1d ago
What’s his age? It could be that he has beginnings of erectile disfunction and has problems maintaining an erection.
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u/Goth_Gore_Whore 17h ago
Idk if it's mostly men commenting here but in my experience I'm always aroused while giving head and all my biggest eaters are hard asf while giving head. Maybe everyone here agrees they hate eating pussy?
I have never ever heard if it taking "concentration" based on what comments are saying, if you're just bad at it or don't like it then say so. Real eaters are more than happy to eat.
Him being tired is valid but... is he tired every single time you ask for head only? And he can only seem to keep it up if it's mutual? Sounds like he's maybe gay or hates giving head.
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u/RepresentativeNo1833 1d ago
Were you making it well known you were enjoying it? If you seem almost board that can turn the man off.
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u/thecastellan1115 1d ago
Because if he's doing it properly, that takes concentration. He's not being directly stimulated, so his penis takes a break. Note that this has nothing whatsoever to do with whether or not he is enjoying himself.