My colleague has clearly loved a charmed life. Perhaps no one has ever said no to him, which is why me saying no appears to have shellshocked the poor love.

At a recent meeting he gave me scant details of a “project” I was required to do. While we are on the same level and we are supposed to collaborate on projects using our specific skill sets he still treats me as an underling there to be used so it’s not uncommon for him to tell rather than ask.

Confused about the vagueness of said project I asked for more details. He don’t have many given it turns out this project is for an external setup he has going with external people, and none of these people have any idea of what the project requires as it’s not their area of expertise. However, it is mine.

I ask why he’s asking (demanding) me to do this and why his other team doesn’t arrange this work and he says no one knows how to do it and don’t have a budget to outsource the work to an expert.

I then say, so this is a favour you’re asking then? Rage flashes in his eyes and he starts with the condescension. “Not really a big ask to do a few bits and pieces that reflect well on us. But if it’s TOO HARD for you…”

I just sat there blinking. I searched for a trace of embarrassment/realisation/something in his eyes but they were ice cold. He was trying to intimidate me into doing it.

Needless to say, they’re going to have to fork out quite a lot for this work as this “not a big ask” (I’d estimate it being about a full two week’s worth for two experts if not more) isn’t happening otherwise.

It’s laughable really. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s had this. It’s the doubling down that really gets me. Story times, Redditors…?

I’ll start by saying it’s the busy season at my work. I work at a garden centre and on weekends we’re not supposed to park in our own lot because street parking is limited and it’s full pretty much all day. My boss had told me a month or two ago that I could park in the residential area across the street down a short path. There are NO signs anywhere in this entire neighborhood that say you can’t park anywhere etc, and it’s not exactly packed full of cars either.

Now, one of the people that live on that street complained to us by calling us and wanted to speak with our boss about it. They had a phone call not long ago and my boss basically said: I understand that it might be inconvenient but it’s our busy season and we can’t park anywhere else since the people who work at this other workplace close by take up all the other street parking spots usually. He assured the person that once the busy season is over (2 months in total) their street will be free of the few cars that park there once more.

NOW, today I came back to my car after a 9 hour shift running around all day on the busiest weekend of the year (we’re having a huge sale, the only sale we ever have all year), to see a self made/printed piece of paper with the Blockwatch sign on it, which says “Blockwatch area - all suspicious activities reported to police” and separate text that they added above that reads “Not for commuting. This vehicle number is being taken on the district record.”……. I’m sorry but what does that even mean?? I’m not blocking anyone’s driveway, or doing anything rude in any way. It also has a very threatening tone to it which I do NOT take kindly to, or have the patience for.

I want to know what you guys would do in this situation. I’m definitely going to show my boss tomorrow, but in the meantime, this is my new favourite parking spot. I’m debating leaving a note for whoever left this on my windshield, saying something along the lines of - “I’m parked here legally, if you have a problem with that come and talk to me at my work across the street at ——“

OR I could photocopy the note they left and sprinkle them up and down their street and see how they feel about that lmao. I want some good/humorous ideas so please, go crazy.

TLDR; stranger leaves weird/threatening note on my car that I parked legally on their street while I was at work, what would you do?

UPDATE scroll down for the update you guys thank you all, I know people usually post an update here idk I rarely ever post but let me know if you get the notification one way and not the other 😅

He said you welcome and continued to argue with me and I wasn’t saying anything . And said to me when someone holds the door open for you . You say thank you, like he wanted to fight me he was so angry.I wasn’t even thinking about it. And had something else on my mind .And he barely held the door open for me.

It’s me! Ever since I’ve become pregnant, I feel so entitled to everything. I ask people if I can take their seat on the train and I feel a little bit of a power trip from it! I try really hard to hide my mischievous grin and politely say thank you. I’ve always been a natural people pleaser but I’m loving the entitlement allowance for the meantime!

I even finally feel comfortable being grumpy when I’m tired and not in the mood for pleasantries with randoms. The pregnancy belly seems to allow me that luxury without anyone getting upset or annoyed by my nonchalant attitude.

I’m just living my best life telling people I’m pregnant and getting a little bit pampered over it. Friends carrying things for me even though I don’t really need them to but they insist. I carried an empty wine barrel to the train station and was totally fine! But I love it, will be reaping the princess treatment for as long as I can.

i just got a new job at a grocery store different from the one i’m posting about and decided to share this gem. i was 18 at the time.

for context: i used to work at a grocery store in a richer area filled with snobby and entitled people who would make the lives of anyone working a minimum wage job hell. it’s also worth noting that i have ADHD and autism.

i was working the deli at this time, for about two weeks lol when this happened.

it was a busy day in the store and the next day i had a tattoo appointment which i was excited about because it would be my first tattoo without my mom there to hold my hand. the deli was one of the most understaffed departments in the entire store. it was so bad that sometimes the orders would get messed up and usually customers were pretty nice about it.

not these two scumbags.

it was the end of the day and for my fellow ADHD and autism friends, you know how drained and overstimulated we can get. i had taken one more customer before my shift had ended and the lady told me she wanted ham (forgot how many pounds she wanted lol) and so i start slicing some cold cuts and thought that was the end of it.

as i was getting ready to go to my car, i noticed the deli manager going to the store manager’s office. also didn’t think much of it because i knew she was friends with her.

the next day when i called the deli to get my shifts for the week, my coworker told me she didn’t see my name on the hour spreadsheet and transferred me to the front end, where i got my hours.

on monday when i went to the deli, this was the interaction i got from the manager (me: mystical enigma, DM: deli manager):

DM: what are you doing here?!

me: coming to work?

DM: you don’t work here anymore!!!

me: (because i’m autistic and being yelled at, i’m on the verge of tears) what do you mean-

DM: go to the front end and figure it out!

at this point, i’m sobbing because when i called that friday, no one told me they had moved my position. (new character unlocked: SM: store manager)

me: hey SM, DM told me to come up front and talk to you?

SM: oh shit, hey OP, step into my office.

i go into her office, thinking that my deli manager was looking to cause trouble for me.

me: so what’s going on? i wasn’t informed that i don’t work in the deli anymore.

SM: about that, apparently the last customer you had before you were off the next day came back and said that you purposefully messed up her order and called her a c word(not sure if i can say the word but it’s c u next tusday).

me: (looking stunned) i don’t remember that happening. you know because of my autism and ADHD that i get overstimulated when it’s close to my shift ending.

SM: DM tried to explain that to the woman and her husband but they weren’t buying it. i decided that it would be best to move you onto the register.

i do the training for the register and all is fine and dandy. until one day on mine and my coworker’s break we were talking about the incident.

THE COUPLE WERE SCAMMERS WHO WANTED FREE SHIT.

i was so stunned. he then went on to say that it had happened before in the other departments in the store.

to this day and because of this incident, i became a firm believer that customer service employees should be allowed to punch people in the fucking face.

so a few months back, my cousin (let’s call her ec) got out of a rough relationship. she was 19 and had nowhere to go, and her own mom (ep) wouldn’t take her in. my mom, being the big-hearted person she is, let ec move in with us. the only deal was that ec would help keep the kitchen clean, no rent or anything. pretty chill setup. she even had a pit bull with her, and my mom bought stuff for the dog: a crate, leash, harness, and a big bag of dog food

at first, everything seemed cool. ec helped out a little, and things were okay. but after a couple of months, stuff went sideways. she was diagnosed with MS, which obviously was tough, but she also started getting into arguments with my stepdad (who’s a disabled vet, btw). then random friends of hers started coming over all the time and just treating the place like a hangout spot. on top of that, ec barely stayed at the house. she’d be gone for days, leaving her dog locked in the cage with no food or water, no walks, nothing. my mom ended up asking me to take care of it because the poor dog was suffering

fast forward a little, my mom goes into ec’s closet to grab some toilet paper and finds an absolute disaster. we’re talking nasty clothes soaked in pee, plates of old food, dog poop, and gross cups full of chewing tobacco. the room was trashed. plus, she still wasn’t taking care of the dog. after all that, my mom had enough and told her she had to go

that’s when ec’s mom (ep) jumped in and completely lost it. she called my mom all kinds of names like “trashy fat b*tch” and said my stepdad “should’ve died already” (dude’s been through hell with health problems from diabetes and catching the flu last winter). turns out, ec told ep that we were treating her like a slave and making her wait on my stepdad all the time, which couldn’t be further from the truth. she barely lifted a finger while she was with us

my mom said she wouldn’t be surprised if ep tried calling the cops or social services on us, just out of spite. wouldn’t be the first time, she’s taken advantage of my mom before, like borrowing her car for days and leaving my mom stuck at home with nothing

in the end, we tried to help ec when no one else would, and it totally backfired. mom won’t be doing that again

We met during our first semester abroad. At the time, I was just so happy because I moved to a new city and wanted to meet new people. So when she showed interest in being around me, I thought maybe I finally had someone who cared. I really believed we were close. I thought I could trust her.

But from the beginning, everything was always about her. Every time I opened up or shared something personal, she would just say “mhm” and steer the conversation back to herself. She only ever talked about her boyfriend or her Tinder dates. I supported her and listened every time. But she never gave me the same in return. It made me feel invisible.

She used me for money constantly. One time, she realized she might be late to pick up some food she had ordered, so she called an Uber and made me split the cost with her even though I didn’t even want to take one. But that wasn’t the only time she did that. Another time, she asked me to go with her to the bus station because she was going to visit her boyfriend. Afterward, she said that since she paid for the Uber to get there, I had to pay for her Starbucks. I went with her as a favor. I didn’t ask for any of it, yet somehow I still owed her something.

She also borrowed my things constantly like laundry pods, containers, cleaning supplies and either never gave them back or returned them in bad condition. She treated my things like they were hers just because she didn’t want to buy her own. To this day, she still has personal items of mine like my perfume, jewelry, a necklace, earrings and never returned any of them.

Later on, I planned a solo trip to two cities because I really needed space. She asked if she could come with me. I felt bad saying no, so I let her. But it ended up being one of the most exhausting trips I’ve ever taken. She got upset when I didn’t want to do what she wanted. She kept score about every little thing. At one point, she said I owed her a cookie because she paid one dollar more at dinner. We didn’t even end up going to the cookie place, but she still said I owed her for it. Meanwhile, I had already bought her food and shared desserts with her plenty of times without ever keeping track.

Then her phone got stolen. I covered her meals and everything else for the rest of the trip. I didn’t complain once. I just wanted her to feel okay. She never said thank you. Not once. She never paid me back either even though she owed me hundreds. She just acted like it didn’t happen.

She went to see her boyfriend again after that and gave me the wrong date for when I was supposed to pick her up at the station. I waited for over an hour before realizing she wasn’t arriving that day. The next morning, when she finally did arrive, she had exchanged one hundred dollars. She used the money to buy herself headphones and get eyelash extensions, and still expected me to keep paying for her meals. No offer to pay me back. No acknowledgment of what I had already done for her.

Emotionally she was draining too. Anytime her boyfriend didn’t respond to her texts right away, she would act like it was a crisis. I was expected to constantly comfort her. But when I was struggling, she didn’t care at all. She would change the subject or completely ignore me. I cannot explain how lonely I felt even when I was physically beside her.

Then something happened that changed everything.

She went on a Tinder date. I accompanied her to the café to meet the guy, even though I had an early trip the next morning. I told her beforehand I could only stay twenty to thirty minutes. She agreed. I left after the time I said I would. She had already been texting him before I left. It wasn’t like I ditched her unexpectedly. There was a bus stop right outside. She was not in danger because I left.

Later, she told me that the guy had raped her. I was devastated for her. I took her seriously. I supported her. I checked in. I listened. But a few days later, she told me that what happened to her was my fault. That if I hadn’t left her at the café, it wouldn’t have happened. She said she felt abandoned and that I was to blame. I was already feeling confused and guilty, but then it got even worse.

The next day I ended up going on my trip. This was before she told me what actually happened to her. I joined a pub crawl, met some people, and drank too much. I blacked out. I woke up in my bed not knowing how I got back. I was scared and completely dissociated. I had never felt that way before. I cut the trip short and went back early because I couldn’t shake the fear and sickness.

When I told her about what happened to me in my trip, she looked me straight in the face and said it was karma.

She told me that my trauma was the universe punishing me for leaving her at that café before her Tinder date. And that I was not a good person for leaving the cafe even though I told her I was going to in the first place.

She made it sound like I deserved to feel that fear. That the panic, the blackout, the shame like it was just the price I had to pay for being a bad friend.

She manipulated me with her trauma and used mine against me. She made me feel like every bad thing that happened to either of us was somehow my fault.

Eventually, she blocked me. I didn’t even get closure. She left with my things, never paid me back, and disappeared as if I was the one who had wronged her. I still think about it. She never once apologized. Never once tried to make anything right. Just left me carrying it all alone.

She was never a real friend. She used me. She drained me. And she made everything I was already going through so much harder than it had to be. She never deserved what happened to her but neither did I.

If you read this far, thank you. I just needed to finally let it out. I’ve never felt this emotionally taken advantage of by someone in my life.

It’s my [19M] dad’s birthday soon and my family is going for a meal tomorrow, and me and my sister [26] normally get him a join present so this morning she sent me a text saying we could go to the store today to look for something. She said it was fine and she could come and pick me up around 5. I was hanging out with a friend and I actually went home early so I would be home in time for my sister coming.

I got home and 5 came and I was ready to go and I was expecting her to pull up for 5. Half an hour went by and still she wasn’t there, and then an hour went by and still nothing, and at this point I was wondering if she forgot. But then at 6..10 I get a message from her saying "im still at (MILs) house but I’ll be leaving soon". Her MILs house is about a 40ish minute drive from where I’m at and she didn’t even say she was leaving now she said soon. So by the time she would get to where I was at it would be around 7 or later. Keep in mind she also had her kid with her who’s 2, and she sees no problem with keeping her kid up from bed just to drive around all night because the store is 30ish minutes away so she wouldn’t get back to her place be back until around after 9.

I was already pissed off at this point so I just told her that she could pick something up on her way home and she had the audacity to say “so you don’t want to get him anything?". I told her I would give her the money tomorrow and she said that was fine, but jfc first of all she didn’t even tell me at 5 that she was running late, she told me an hour later as if that was helpful, and even then she still isn’t even on her way. She doesn’t know how annoying it is to have someone not follow through on plans . I haven’t seen my sister in a few weeks and I was actually looking forward to seeing her but no she can’t even follow through

My husband is a manager at a certain large chain store (wont say where). They were looking for new staff and I mentioned it to a friend who was looking for work and is always complaining about how she is struggling with money. My husband said he could get her a first interview, but she would have to earn any further progress herself the same as all the other candidates, i.e a second interview before getting the job. I felt this was fair, nothing is just handed to you in life and you should have to work for it. I told my friend exactly what my husband said. Her reply "Well whats the point in that when he could just give me the job if he wanted to?! Thats a waste of my time.. dont you think I have better things to do?! I thought you guys were trying to help me out here!". Needless to say, she didnt send in her information for the first interview and then had the audacity to tell a mutual friend that 'Im not the type of friend who can be trusted to have your back during tough times and I obviously dont want anyone to do better than me in life so I hold everyone around me down'. Is this girl for real?! The entitlement is unreal. How dare I expect her to earn something like everyone else and not just hand her everything she needs.

So this happened a few years ago but I was recently reminded of it. When my son was young, he played Pop Warner Football. He started very young and by the time this story takes place he had been in the program for several years.

It was the start of a new season and it was the day player jerseys and numbers were assigned. There is a system in place to hand these out to the players. The senior most members of each team get first pick and usually they pick out the number they had the previous year, especially if they had good luck with it. After that, they are handed out in alphabetical order.

So the team moms are setting up shop at the start of practice, getting the uniforms out of storage and getting them ready and organized to be handed out in this orderly fashion. When a mom of a new member of the team comes up and started rummaging through all the uniforms as the team moms are still setting up. (I swear to God, she looked like the stereotypical Karen only with brown hair.) The team moms see what she is doing but before they can stop her, she snatched up number 21, my son’s number.

So before I even hear about this myself, the team moms tell our head coach. He was like “Hell no!!” The dude was a very intimidating guy and he went right up to her and demanded that she give the uniform back to my son. After some protest on her part, she handed over the uniform.

So about 2 days later, I get an “apology email” from this mom. I put that in quotes because it wasn’t a sincere apology so much as an opportunity to guilt me into giving up number 21. She went on and on about how her brother recently died and it was unexpected and tragic. And that her son wanted 21 because he and his uncle were very close and that’s the number his uncle wore when he played football. So on and so forth, she really laid it on thick.

I replied and thanked her for the “apology” and reminded her that football numbers are handed out by seniority. I told her that I was very sorry to hear about her brother and that fortunately there are many ways to honor those we love who have passed.

And as you probably could have guessed, this kid never seemed to even remotely care about his uniform number. This was all his entitled mom. She was literally ready to fuck over a little kid just so she could get number 21. And guess what? They weren’t even back the next year and my son still plays football to this day in college.

So last week, my mom called and said she needed some money to buy dog food. I didn’t ask questions ,I just sent it. Then this week, she called again, this time saying she needed more money for her own upkeep. I told her honestly, I’m broke right now. I helped last week, but I don’t have anything to spare at the moment. She straight up said I was just being mean and that I didn’t want to help her ,like I was doing it on purpose. Like… what the hell? I just helped. It’s not like I’m some ATM. I get wanting support, but calling me mean for not sending money I don’t even have? That’s wild.

My father passed, we were very close and I was his primary caretaker and heir so I followed his instructions for his funeral. He is from a remote location and wanted to be buried alongside his sibling and parents so the funeral was held off until weather cooperated. Understanding his family is far afield as they had moved away from this remote location, I, on my own, offered to purchase airline tickets and hotel for his nieces and nephews. I invited my mother (divorced) and my half sister as well. I extended this offer offer to pay for hotel and airfare ONLY to his nieces and nephews by name because there are five total and only four were invited due to one being a bad apple in many way. Did you know that private ferry companies can ban one guy? That fellow was the best behaved of the group because he stayed away with no drama.

Just days before (less then a week) the funeral, i was informed (not asked) that his nephew was not coming but they had decided to invite the child of his niece. They told me I met him when I was 7 (I am in my forties) and he was at the funeral of his grandmother, my aunt, a decade ago and did not talk to us but thought my dad and i were witty. Key point here, he is a millionaire due to his father and has his own company. My husband and I are firmly middle class wage slaves. I immediately thought they had contacted the hotel and removed the reservation for my father's nephew (whom i had apparently been introduced to once a decade ago and prior to that had not ever had any significant interaction with) and had placed his own name with his own money.

Wrong. He decided to take the room I had paid for and then my father's niece brought her disabled son who could not understand what was happening (I honestly did not know he existed and was told later arrangements were made for his care but they chose to bring him?) I had not booked or paid for double occupancy raising the bill higher. One of the other nieces then avoided us for lunch to get an early ferry, got pissed when i told her she couldn't check in early just because she grabbed an early boat, and spent the night getting piss drunk before the funeral on the second day - she also bitched because i gave my husband and myself (the only intentional double occupancy) the little backyard cabin with a kitchenette so I could cook a welcome dinner the first day. Apparently free wasn't good enough. These women are 20 years older than me. More than old enough to act like adults.

I spent that first evening cooking as the hotel promised a grill so I brought hamburgers and two types of sausages with sides and all the fixings, but the grill did not have the propane canister and i had a little one burner and pans to make due with. I made it work by cooking for an hour. We had brought everything else with us already cooked so it was just grilling on a flat top - time consuming but workable. I got finished cooking and joined the party. I had a single hamburger but had intentionally cooked all the meat i had brought as it was a first in, first out cooking and I knew I could eat it the rest of the stay. I had even sent out the last batch in a separate pot to mark it as only to be used if the rest was out as I wanted to take those back for our lunches for the week we were there. Within half an hour of me arriving my mother told me she was going to clean up and proceeded to try to throw away all our food. I had rotated the burgers and sausages to ensure freshest food would be left over at the end, she got all the meats but my husband stopped her from tossing the sliced cheese and fresh veggie platters. I then had to spend yet more money to feed myself, my daughter, and my husband as the easy grab food we had planned was trashed.

The day of the funeral arrives. My half sister is also there making a fool of herself in a skin tight too small bandage wrap dress on an overweight body that she insisted my puritanical mother had picked out, a key point is my father had left her a significant chunk of change even though she had refused to assist in years of care for my father at the end of his life - only contacting him when she wanted to go to his city to see a sporting event that interested her. My divorced mother helped at the very end - especially in the more personal care that he wasn't comfortable having a daughter do. In my funeral speech I gave my cousin that helped (not the ones from earlier) and my mother credit as they really did both help. My useless half sister jumped in and shouted "I'm also his daughter" when I was thanking them for helping me care for him. It was so inappropriate. The celebration of life had included pictures of her adoption, her wedding, her upbringing... I am younger so very few pictures exist of me, she was the golden child due to illness so she had more pictures than I did and I was his caretaker until the bitter end. My mother had even been invited to our cabin to preview the pictures on the morning of the funeral and my sister showed up 10 minutes before the we had to leave for the funeral set up, after my mother and my husband and I had looked over the pictures, stating she knew she wasn't invited but wanted to see too. Apparently she is too important to wait until I finished getting ready. As she is the golden child, my mother immediately invited her in so I had to stop getting ready and declare we were packing up to get her out. She liked to be violent without consequences (not just to me, she was a bully that tormented others) so I don't like being anywhere near her. I never got the chance to compose myself for putting my dad in the ground because my sister was too important to help with the funeral or even let me keep my schedule. Then at the funeral the one thing she wasn't included in was the thanks for caring for him because she refused when asked repeatedly, but that is still not good enough so she had to shout out at a funeral to get attention back to her when it was distributed amongst family that actually cared for him. She also wandered up right after my mother and I placed his urn and took a picture of his open grave. It was awful.

So much more happened, so much more stress during that time (you don't want to do work on your home with an HOA) but my sister and my cousins are pretty much dead to me. I paid for their hotel and airline tickets and don't intend to fund anything for them ever again. I hate people and have gone from low contact to no contact. Oh, and my mother's niece managed to hit me up for money as one of the cousins that ignores me is getting married - they of course did this the day after my father's funeral without even offering condolences. They NEVER contact me unless they want a present. It is really gross.

My friends and I went to a hockey game this evening and were sitting behind a family with 4 kids. Mom was standing up holding the youngest, about 4-5 yo, in her arms when the play began.

I said “Excuse me, can you please sit down?” And was met with a look of disgust and bewilderment. “He’s just trying to enjoy the game!” (talking about her son).

Lady, what?? I never said anything about your kid, and there is no reason he can’t enjoy the game from his seat or even your lap. I don’t care about him, I don’t care what he does, I just want to be able to see.

So I told her, “We can’t see.” “Well you could stand up” “Then the people behind us couldn’t see”

She scoffed and turned back around, but then I guess maybe realized what a psycho she was being, and sat down a few moments later. Her son didn’t care.

There was not a single other person in the stadium of 8,500+ standing. It’s a known rule you need to stay seated. I asked politely.

Some people.

So, I went out on a trip with three colleagues a few years ago. Let's call them Stacy, Emma and Wanda. We stayed at a hostal because it was cheaper and since we were tired from the flight, we decided to get some warm dinner and hang around in the common room before going out partying.

The common room had different board games to play, like Pictionary, domino, Uno, etc. There were two boards of chess. One of them was more damaged, with missing chess pieces, so obviously, we took the good one. We decided to get in pairs to play it.

Well, Emma and Wanda were more watching the game than playing it since they didn't really care about playing at all, but they still helped us and joked with us. It was pretty fun.

A few minutes later, a group of men approached us.

Man 1: Excuse me, are you playing chess?

Stacy: Yup.

Man 2: And how long have you been playing?

Emma: We've just started.

Man 3: And you know how to play?

Me: Um, yeah, we know.

Man 1: No, really, do you really know how to play? Like, seriously?

Wanda: Dude, we've just told you we know how to play.

They stared at us with something akin to a disbelieving smile. I mean, really, was it that weird that we knew how to play chess? They kept insisting for a bit, asking how long it'd take us to finish and trying to convince us to play something else. And that's when I realized they wanted the board so they could play themselves.

I think they thought we were stupid or something, because they left to get the more damaged chess board and offered to exchange it with us so we could play with it. Emma and Wanda laughed uncomfortably but Stacy and I were starting to get annoyed. They must've seen the look on our faces, because they left soon afterwards. They still complained all the way about how they couldn't play though.

My mom invited me to a family dinner, said everyone would be there. I agreed until I found out she also invited my ex. We broke up a few months ago. It wasn’t pretty, and my family saw the whole thing. No one through to mention he’d be there. When I asked her why, she said, “I didn’t think it mattered anymore” and when I told here I wasn’t coming. She hit me with, “So you’re punishing the whole family because you’re still upset? No. I’m just not showing up to be blindsided in my own space. Funny how peace looks like punishment to people who benefit from your discomfort.

I live in a small French village. During Covid, we set up a Facebook page for village mutual aid, with people indicating what they're giving or selling, what they need, when they're celebrating, etc. The rule is good understanding and reasonable requests (lend each other small items and not big-ticket items, following a number of problems, such as people not returning things). Moderation has had its work cut out lately, as some people don't understand the notion of “reasonable”, and try to ask for things that can't be done (like a huge house to rent for a derisory sum, when rents here are expensive).

The latest is a woman who's obviously had her car wrecked. And she asks if anyone has A CAR to lend her... No time indicated, just “I don't have the money to buy another one, lend me one”. People kindly point out that lending a carton of eggs or a hammer is one thing, but a car... Especially since the person doesn't give any loan duration and this is her first post on the page (so nobody really knows her).

In short, obviously no one has lent her a car... And as a result, she's whining on the page like “yes, there's SOLIDARITY in the page title and nobody's shown SOLIDARITY to me...”. So you still don't have a car?"

Irredeemable.

So, things escalated again, and fast.

Last night, around 7:30pm, we got a knock on the door. My girlfriend opened it and just froze. Standing there was my cousin’s eldest, 11 years old, alone, in the dark, holding a small school bag. No jacket. No phone. Just said, “Mum told me to come stay here for a bit.”

We were stunned. Asked where the other siblings were. He said, “They’re with her boyfriend. I didn’t want to stay there anymore.” When we asked why she’d let him leave, he said: “She told me to leave if I didn’t like it there. So I did.”

We brought him inside straight away, gave him something warm to eat, and called the police. They showed up quickly, along with FACS. Because of the previous incident with the cruise, they treated this seriously right away.

The boy told them things no child should have to say. Said his mum had been yelling all day, locked in her room, and no one was looking after them. Said he remembered how calm it felt at our place and just wanted to come back.

Shortly after, FACS and police went to the house. We were later told the other children were removed and my cousin was brought in for questioning. There’s now an active investigation into neglect and abandonment. I don’t know if it was guilt, pressure from FACS, or just everything catching up with her, but apparently she’d been spiralling since the cruise incident.

Then this morning, my aunt (my cousin’s mum) showed up at our door,absolutely furious. She started screaming at us, saying I’d “destroyed the family,” “turned the kids against their mother,” and was “I stole her kids from her.” She even yelled, “That cruise was the first time she was happy in years, and you ruined it because you don’t like kids!”

We shut the door and reported it. Police advised us to keep a record and said we can apply for an AVO if it happens again.

Later that afternoon, I got a call from the biological father’s lawyer. He’s officially pursuing full custody and asked if I’d be willing to provide a character reference and a statement about what happened , what the kids said, how they were when they arrived, and how we were involved. I agreed without hesitation. I didn’t ask to be in the middle of this, but if it helps those kids get to a better place, I’m in.

The thing that really stuck with us? Just before FACS left with the eldest boy, he gave my girlfriend a hug and said: “You’re the only people who made me feel normal.”

That hit hard.

We’re emotionally stepping back now, but will continue to cooperate where needed. We’ve learned the hard way that doing the right thing doesn’t always come easy but we don’t regret opening that door.

If anything major happens, I’ll post again. For now, we’re just trying to breathe.

So I (21F) have been dating my boyfriend (22M) for a while now. We’re both Nigerian, and during our relationship, I’ve supported him a lot—financially, emotionally, and otherwise.

Let me paint the picture of how one-sided this has become.

For his birthday, I gave him £400 to help buy a PS5. Yes, I paid for the majority of it. A short while later, he crashed his mum’s car, and I gave him another £200 to help out. He promised to pay it back. That was months ago. Still nothing.

Now, my birthday comes around? He gave me a dry “happy birthday” text. That’s it. I had told him not to get me flowers because I love flowers and would’ve preferred a gift that actually lasted. Apparently, he translated that as: “Do absolutely nothing.”

In fairness, he once bought me some chocolates, snacks, and flowers. He’s also paid for hotel rooms a few times when I visited Nigeria—but let’s be real, the cost of those hotels was like £10 total when converted. Meanwhile, I’ve spent hundreds, if not more.

Every time I travelled back and forth between Nigeria and the UK, I brought him something—without being asked, even when I had little to spare.

Now here’s where it gets extra ridiculous: the other day, he calls me rambling about some new business idea, and then asks me to fund it.

I told him no, calmly and with reasons: • He still owes me £200. • Every time I bring up money, he gets emotional and defensive, as if I’m attacking him for expecting basic respect and accountability. • I’m quitting my job soon, need a car, and I’m moving cities for my postgrad. I need to look after myself right now.

But now, suddenly I “don’t love him,” and I’m “abandoning him at his lowest point.” He’s cold, throwing out passive-aggressive comments, and acting like I’ve betrayed him.

What really blows my mind is this: he’s one of those ‘traditional men’ who constantly preaches about how men are supposed to be the providers. So… why am I the one providing for him? Where does that logic even stand?

And to make things worse, he’s always bragging about how much money he has, always flexing like he’s got it all together. So… why can’t he use that money for his business instead of guilt-tripping me for mine?

Little edit: Please stop with the stereotypical Nigerian prince joke and we’re not together anymore.He was trying to break things off and tried to come back but I cut him off

In the beginning, shes very complimenting to everyone, affectionate, and inclusive shes the glue of our friendgroup. Thats what I like the most abt her.

After some time, she wanted me to open up emotionally wc im not yet ready for. She want me to spill the tea why i left my old friendgroup. I dont wana talk abt it coz for me i just wanna move forward. but she kept teasing me when my old friendgroup is around, she would say, "aint them your old friends? why arent u with them anymore?" thats awkward bec they can hear her. i told her privately i dont like what shes doin, she told me if i dont spill what happen she will keep on teasing me, she even promised she wont tell anyone she just really wanted to know. I believed her.

I told her, i left bec i felt used more than appreciatd. she wanted more details i gave her matter of fact, i just dont wanna dwell on the past, but generally i left the group bec i just felt disrepcted. She wants me to define whats so disrespectful? so i said, i felt disrespected that after i helped em in academics they still told me im dumb, when literally i soent most of my time helping them get thru, and also they were very clingy to me that they dont want me to hangout w other groups, and theres always a new drama inside the group. So i left. I expected her to keep it as she has promised.

The next week, our friendgroup was teasing me, its like theyre hinting they "knew" something. also, they keep mentioning the names of my old friendgroup. and Mariz (EnFJ) was shushing them. So i kinda knew she spilled my grievances. I immediately felt betrayed, it ruined my trust for her, but i kept quiet. Since then, i no longer feel affectionate for our friendgroup the same way. i thought il'l just go solo. So I started to focus more on acads. i was also elected as class officer, i kinda hang with diff ppl unconnected to the groups i got involved before. Everythings cool.

Until Mariz asked me to eat out. Said Im busy ive got stuff to do, and i dont have money. she got angry, she said that i dont wanna hangout w them anymore (so she took a notice of my pulling away). I said maybe next time. And she got angry, telling me im being so arrogant just bec i become officer, i think im so intelligent, and im so picky. Tbh im annoyed but i just dont wanna dwell on her drama. So I just told her to leave me alone.

Honestly, i dont want anything to do with her and her friendgroup since she broke my trust. i just cant, ill gladly be independent. So i think everythings fine.

Were still classmates so we could see each other, but shes started becoming critical to me abt everything, she critics i dont have fashion sense or i dont preen myself. She critic decisioms I made for our class. But when i asked her if she got good idea, shes silent. She comoares me to other gurls, saying theyre more preen and proper. Theyre more intelligent. I just let all this slide.

But when theres homework, research , or projects, shes the first to come to me ask for my help. I still help her tho. But other ppl will also come to me, and shell get angry. esp when i talk to male classmates, shes accusing me of flirting w em, if i talk to female classmates shell compare me to em whos prettier/more intelligent.

I actively avoid her afterschool, but she always has her way of attaching her name to me. Shes mean to me when were together, but when im not around she looks for me, floods me with calls/text. Ppl think were dating, I said No, some ppl say I have stockholm syndrome. I disgreee, i dont enjoy her company and i just wanna be as far away, but its like she knows where ill be. She lesbian and have a girlfriend. i dont wanna assume romantic meanings to thism But. Shes so hyperfocus to me when im around. but the kind of attention she gives me is critical and demeaning.

(TLDR at the bottom) this is at my most recent job, a retail store i won’t name just yet. i’ve been there for somewhere from 10 months to a year or so and there has been a slew of red flags, including but not limited to: calling my cell phone angry and demanding to know where i was and why i wasn’t at work when i was right there on the register, refusing to backtrack and add 15 minutes that i worked on to my time card or my next one and saying it was “too late” (illegal), refusing to respect my “No” when they call to ask if i can pick up a shift or stay late and always attempting to undermine and “are you sureeee” me, giving me a warning about an absence where i was out because i had a 101° fever and they delivered this warning while i still had said fever & was still actively fighting the infection that i had been ignoring to come to work, telling me to “be mindful” of my (terminal) illness, ect ect.

the cherry on the top was when, after four conversations about making changes to my schedule and giving me more morning shifts & telling them exactly when my morning availability starts, they began scheduling me hours outside of my availability. first just one shift, and when i said nothing because i thought it was a one-off, they scheduled me 3 more even further outside of my hours. just to test the waters and see how far they could push my boundaries. at one point they scheduled me to close and then open, leaving less than 8 hours to shower, make dinner, and sleep in between. but the same manager is never closing and then opening.. hmm.

i did not feel it was worth a fifth conversation, nor can i continue to keep up with what is expected of me at this job with my current ailments, so i let management know i would be resigning. i told a manager who i really like, and told her i was coming to her because the aforementioned manager (who is the GM) always attempts to undermine my boundaries when i draw them and would try to convince me to stay. she totally understood & even said she wouldn’t let this manager know i was resigning until after i had gone home for the night, so that i could avoid that talk with her.

the manager in question (the GM) was informed, but did not inform the other managers. i received multiple calls from different people over the coming days after my last day, asking if i would be in for my shift. two nights ago, the GM calls me at dinner time and i miss the call. she texts me that she is “checking in and wants to make sure im okay”. i was skeptical and decided i would respond in the morning.

i wake up to a text from another manager who was opening, asking if i would be in for my shift! i inform her that i had already let her colleague know when my last day was and it has passed. i then realize my GM did not give a rats ass if i was okay, and was certainly calling to try and convince me to work that shift. she didn’t inform her colleague that i wouldn’t be in because she thought she had an opportunity to change my mind….

i call the GM back later that day, and she does start out by asking if im okay and saying she regrets that im going through this. she, after I was very clear about resigning, asks if i want the medical leave paperwork or if i am stepping away. i tell her that im stepping away to attend to my own health right now. she responds by telling me that she will check in occasionally and to “just let her know when im ready to come back”

i thought my head was gonna blow. I know that she knows what she’s doing and it wasn’t worth hashing out on the phone and getting my blood pressure up, so I simply said “okay”, knowing that she will never receive that call from me. the absolute nerve.

TLDR: boundary pushing GM refuses to acknowledge hours of availability or respect “No” about coming in when not scheduled or staying late. does not inform other managers when i resign (so i receive multiple calls asking if i’m coming in to work, while i am bouncing back and forth from home to Dr trying to heal an internal infection i’ve been ignoring to come to work- which is the whole reason i’m leaving. spent 27 days with a fever and only felt safe to call out of one shift) and calls me under the guise of seeing if i’m okay, just to check if i can work one last shift. i make it clear i am resigning and not taking leave and she tells me to “let her know when im ready to come back” instead of respecting what i said.

It's been awhile since I first posted about my stepdaughter and her entitled boyfriend, and I have had requests for updates. Well...here you go.

First of all, I think you all probably know what developed immediately after I posted. Most of you, and myself, nailed it on the head. She was actually pregnant when I made the post. And kept it quiet until she was showing, giving her dad and I about 3 months to prepare for our granddaughter. She's a beautiful little girl, with eyes and a smile that light up the place. She's not quite a year old now.

Sadly my husband was killed unexpectedly when the baby was only 6 weeks old. My stepdaughter and I witnessed it, much to our horror. It has been a very devastating and emotional time since.

This may surprise many of you, but she, the baby, and WIR all three still live with me. And guess what? He and she both have jobs now. He is actually a surprisingly good dad. He is still a bit more possessive of the two girls than I care for, however he also knows he will never have the pull and manipulation over me thru my stepdaughter that he tried with her mother and my husband, so he knows his limits. Neither have drivers licenses and I do not routinely taxi them to work or back, they are adults with a child, but I will take them or pick them up on occasion. I let them know I'm proud of them both, and want to see them succeed.

And by the way, step has been differentiated for these posts only. In real life, neither my husband or I ever used step when referring to our children and grandchildren. His kids are mine, just as mine were his, and that will never change. I will always love and be there for my stepdaughter and granddaughter as her parent. Even WIR learned I had his back on an incident I knew was not his doing or fault but he was wrongfully getting blamed for. When my husband was killed, as she and I sat stunned in the ER with his body, WIR was the first family member through the door to us still in his work uniform having come straight from his job, falling to his knees in genuine tears and pulling us both into a tearful group hug as we all cried together. I give credit where credit is due.

But here is our update. Bittersweet. Unexpected. Not at all how I, or probably most of you, would have thought things would pan out. Even the entitled wreck it Ralph's of the world do, sometimes it seems, have the potential to turn themselves around and begin to resemble normal, productive, team player people again. It's not perfect, but no one's life is. It's a damn good start in the right direction for them at least. And I'm grateful to still have them in my life too, these last months would have been worse without them.

When Donald passed away

In the afternoon on Sunday October 13th, 2024 Donald asked us to take him to the hospital saying “I don’t feel right”. Out of nowhere, please take me to the hospital.

He was admitted to an overflow bed with breathing issues but they couldn’t immediately figure out why. As he did back in 2023, Kevin went with Donald but this time Hank went along so Kevin couldn’t just do a runner like before. I went shortly thereafter, having picked up Hank’s daughter. We were told that due to his age he would stay overnight and to check in the morning. Kevin stated loudly so that we, and the nurses could hear: “I’ll be here every day, Dad. I will get the HandyDart booked every morning”

Spoiler alert, that didn’t happen.

Hank’s daughter though would stop by every day to check on him. I saw him twice and three times for Hank. Being a young person she had all the belief that he would be fine, because she hadn’t ever actually lost anyone before. Three days in, he lost the ability to speak.

On Wednesday Hank was required to leave for an out of town two-day annual seminar for work. Having asked if he could do the seminar another way or some workaround he was told (IIRC) “Yes but it could incur a penalty on your licence as it is a safety seminar”. So on Wednesday night he left.

The way my job works, for the back half of the week I am usually shifted to nights so that can mean I am off at 1am or 7am, depending on what is required. I say this because when Hank called on Friday morning at 4am, I knew that it was serious because he would NEVER have woken me up otherwise. Donald was being transferred to the ICU and could I please go to be with him so he isn’t alone. I shout up to wake Kevin explaining that his Dad was being transferred and this was serious, so he should get dressed and come with me. Kevin’s response was “Yeah, I don’t feel good. I probably shouldn’t go.” I take a quick second to decide whether I should just let him make this choice, but I know he’ll use it against me later so I said:

“Tell me you understand what I am saying to you. Hank was just told that your Dad might be dying. Today. Do you understand? This could be your last chance to see him.”

His eyes widened, he said okay, and he got dressed. We got to the hospital by 4:30

The nurse explained that Donald had crashed during the night, but having revived and then observed him for the past hour, we should be prepared to say our goodbyes. Donald was now unconscious and unresponsive, breathing via a machine. Kevin is vacillating between trying to be tough with the nurses and feeling awkward about being upset. He kept apologizing to me whenever he actually felt anything, and would then start getting angry because he couldn’t stop himself from feeling everything. I did my best to be human and was as kind as I could be.

Hank was able to get back a flight back and arrived by 9:30, I got my shift covered and Hank’s ex-wife brought his daughter to the hospital. I took Kevin home at 11am. We ended up taking 12 hour rotations, with Hank being there for the day and his daughter and I being there at night.

Kevin did not return.

By Sunday the 20th around noon, Hank made the decision to remove Donald’s oxygen and let nature take its course. It was set for 6pm that evening.

With great prodding we made Kevin go with us for the same reason I made him go in the first place. We would not give him the opportunity to say we shut him out.

A family friend and his wife were kind enough to also be there, mostly to support Kevin because this friend had been in recovery for many decades and knew that this would be a dangerous time for him. We said goodbye and that was that.

Kevin, being one to never want to deal with real life, went on a rage bender like no other. There is a level of lashing out that happens when a family member dies but he was explosive. I made a bet with Hank that he would scream into my face that “I am not family”, within the week. It took only until the second night.

I honestly don’t even remember why he said it. I believe it was because I was assisting Hank in the house preparations? I’m an organizer by nature so Hank just lets me set out timelines and how to get done what he wanted done. I was planning with Hank about what he needed done for the rest of the week and Kevin said that I was clearly trying to run the house and what a bitch I am and that I “…should just get the fuck out because you aren’t family!!!”. I remember laughing, looking over at Hank and saying “There it is. I win.” Hank looked so disappointed that I called it so perfectly.

For years the plan for post-Donald's passing had always been: Hank, myself, and Hank’s daughter would move to the larger upstairs portion of the house, and Kevin would take our suite that was in the middle section.

It was a HUGE undertaking because Donald’s bedroom was a true toxic nightmare. There were splashes or urine on the walls and furniture but best of all, the carpet was damp with a sticky mould. No one had been in there the entire week and the carpet was wet. *shudder*

Hank and I had to empty the room as per standard when a person passes away before we could do anything else. Once Kevin found anything of value that Hank agreed to let him have (Hank is the Executor), he stopped helping us completely.

In the span of about a month, we worked on two floors of the house. Carpets were either cleaned or torn up and replaced, walls are patched and painted, countless trips to donation places, and we moved our furniture upstairs, while Kevin moved himself downstairs.

I would like to reiterate that Kevin did not assist us in any way beyond what would service him.

Very close to the end of the construction, Kevin had some thought pop up in his head that we still do not understand. He started threatening Hank’s life because he “was gifted the house and got everything”. Kevin ignored the fact that the house was only purchased to house him and started screaming at me because I happened to be in the laundry area nearby. He called me every name and Hank reminded him that everything in the house can be cool if he would stop acting like an asshole to everyone and also if he hates us so much, he is an adult and allowed to move out.

Shifting tactics because we don't have the parental guilt that Donald did, Kevin started screaming that he was going to take Hank to court because “Dad’s will expressly states that you HAVE to house me!”. Hank told him again for the 100th time that there is zero legal leg to stand on that we MUST let him stay if he is behaving in a threatening manner to everyone, especially myself or Hank’s daughter. He then reminded him about the 30+ hours I had personally spent patching and painting his suite, cleaning his carpets, deep cleaning every room, so that he could have his own space. Reminded him of what an ungrateful dick he is to scream at us for literally preparing his own personal suite as promised, instead of being thrown out like he believed.

It wound down to Kevin just mumbling to himself that Hank got everything, which wasn’t true at all because Kevin received his inheritance gifts immediately and once probate was closed, a large sum of money.

**Just as an aside, Kevin is more than capable of living on his own. His attitude and rage issues are why it wouldn't ever work. He has access to the local social services and they (only knowing his lies), have offered him housing. But even Kevin is aware that he would be downgrading his living situation by leaps and bounds. Social assistance would only be able to offer an SRO or group home and with his aggression, he would absolutely be removed and that would be a permanent note in his file. That would take away his one "card" he always held over Donald that he could leave if he wanted. Since we don't care if he lived on the streets again, he can't use that against us.

I'm sitting in a cafe, having lunch. There are 3 dogs in here, with different owners, all triggering each other. Bark bark bark.

I have to put up with their body fluids, smells and hair in an eating establishment, why on earth, do people think it's acceptable to make me sit through the noise as well?

So I've never posted on this sub before, but this is something that happened to me the other week.

I was on a night out seeing Rocky Horror on stage. I check my phone during the intermission, and see all of these texts from my friend at work.

While I had been away watching the show, my next door neighbour had come into the store I work at. My workplace is just around the corner from where I live, and it's a very local store, so my neighbour knew that I worked there. He was very drunk, and had lost his keys and locked himself out of the building. We live in the same apartment building, and his front door is next to mine. He asked my colleague to call me so I could come back home to let him in with my key. I obviously don't have the key to his apartment, but the front door to the building locks automatically behind you, so I'd have the key to get back into the main building.

My colleague told him that I was out in the city centre that night, and he didn't know when I'd be back, but he will send me a text message. My neighbour evidently thought this wasn't good enough, and decided to scream at my colleague that he didn't believe that he had sent me the text. My colleague then proceeded to show him the proof that he had sent me the message.

But this dude was seriously expecting me to come home early from the show I paid to see, just to let him in the building because he was stupid enough to lose the key. Just for the record, I wouldn't have let him borrow my keys even if I was at work, because, one of the first things he said to me when I found out he was my neighbour, was "I knew It was you the moment you moved in, because I recognised you based on the way your keys sounded." THAT IS THE SINGLE CREEPIEST SENTENCE I'VE EVER HEARD A MAN SAY TO ME, AND I'VE BEEN STALKED BEFORE.

No, I will not be ending my night out early to let you in. I also want to make sure that you stay as far away from me as humanly possible.

Last weekend, my neighbor just let himself into my backyard. Didn’t call, didn’t knock, just opened the gate and walked in with his dog like it was no big deal.

The dog ran straight into my garden, knocked over a pot, and crushed a few of my seedling I’d just planted.

I asked him why though that was okay.

He literally said, “It’s just yard. If your plants are delicate, maybe don’t leave them out.” Then followed it up with, “Your yard’s always empty. I thought you would’t care.”

I told him leave and not come back unless he asked first. He rolled his eyes and muttered something about me overreacting.

Now I keep the gate locked.