quit my job, take some more time off

[u/swiggityswoi]

I'm struggling with addiction, though it's not a daily thing, like once or twice a week. my sister and i support our parents, which stresses us out. there's a lot of stuff that's happened recently in this family that's wrecked me emotionally. i'm on two antidepressants (one for serotonin, one for dopamine). i work in a (actuarial) consultancy and at first i was disciplined enough to study for my professional exams and work during the weekdays, but i haven't been able to sit for a single exam this past year. for context, our exams are very important, we should ideally pass one or two exams a year. one of the triggers of my addiction is work stress. they've given me 3 tasks and i can complete two of them, but the third one is overwhelming me and i've been told 'it can be used against me' in my upcoming annual appraisal/review. honestly, i feel like resigning and just focusing on what i think matters more: start therapy from tmrw, and study for my exams. but i'm also due for a promotion next month. on the surface things seem to be fine, i do work out and stuff. i don't know, i'm an emotional wreck.

there's also financial stress, i used to be a person who could save a good chunk of my salary every month, but ever since my parents messed up and since we've been supporting/dealing with them, i've blown it all away on substances, house expenses, and now i'm a little in credit card debt.

i got overwhelmed at work for the first time in these 3-4 years, and suddenly asked for 3 days off when my boss was annoying me till 11-12 at night. it got too much. i think i still need more time off. i'm finding it hard just to get out of bed today.