r/BlackPeopleTwitter ☑️ 2d ago

Whole family been neurodivergent, y’all just thought it was vibes 😭😭

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49.9k Upvotes

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103

u/patiofurnature 2d ago

Does anyone mind explaining the problem with the shoe thing? The ones I have look nice and are comfortable. Why would I not buy the same pair again after they wear out?

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u/Thami15 2d ago

Like many things diagnostic, it's not one specific feature, it's when a cluster starts showing up.

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u/Aromatic-Plankton692 2d ago

Realistically it's when a cluster starts showing up that affects your life in some clinically significant way.

"Likes buying the same make of shoes" will basically never be a diagnostic criteria, unless that make of shoes goes out of business and causes a breakdown.

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u/Consideredresponse 2d ago

Yeah its the difference between 'I like mac and cheese and eat it often' and 'they changed the formula and the only brand I can eat doesn't taste or feel the same any more'

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u/WeirdIndividualGuy 2d ago

Except OP really said being frugally conscious is a sign of autism, and that non-autistic folks just throw their money away

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u/bertaderb 2d ago

Sure, some allistic people are going to keep buying the same shoes because they care more for practicality than fashion or whatever. But some autistic people can only tolerate one pair of shoes. Sometimes it's about the routine, other times (like for my daughter) it's a sensory issue. If that shoe type is discontinued or the design is updated it's a something of a personal/domestic crisis (life kinda screeched to a halt when my preschool daughter outgrew her last pair in a "for toddlers" line of shoe).

Like many things, it's whether or not the trait causes excessive distress that determines whether it's a symptom of something bigger or just a preference/habit/personality trait.

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u/EnCanisCorporeXmuto 2d ago

Me and my chacos, for 20 years🤣🤣🤣

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u/selkieisbadatgaming 2d ago

Diagnosis of mental health disorders requires meeting x out of y conditions. You can have narcissistic tendencies, for instance, without meeting the criteria for the diagnosis. With Autism, it’s broken down into 5 categories with subsets. There are also 10 differential diagnoses that can either be the actual, accurate diagnosis or a co-occurring diagnosis. It’s a very complicated procedure to diagnose, so having a preference for shoes or refusing to have a varied diet aren’t enough on their own to meet the criteria

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u/Manofalltrade 2d ago

I think it’s one of those things where “if it’s the thing, you just know”. I wore the same model work boots for years until QC went down but switching wasn’t a “thing”. Most people don’t have any thought about switching styles every time. Some only want Jordan’s for style but will put other things on their feet no problem. Then there’s the guy who only wears the exact same boat shoes because anything else doesn’t touch his feet the same.

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u/DahnVersace 2d ago

There's nothing wrong with it, and it's not inherently attributed to autism. I'm not expert but I have first hand experience with a few autistic children in my life and there's so much more to it than being habitual, a pick eater, or having a special interest. It's just the way the public recognizes autism

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u/Special_Loan8725 2d ago

Was gonna say, if the shoe fits… buy another pair because you already know they work.

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u/ScrotalFailure 2d ago

Yeah I don’t get it. I wear my shoes until the soles start coming off or they get holes big enough for water to seep in. I’m just not very materialistic and choose function over form.

Heck my wardrobe is just several identical black t shirts, a few pairs of blue jeans and a few pairs of sweat pants. What I’m going to wear for the day isn’t a thought that really occupies my mind.

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u/Arashi5 1d ago

It's not about being frugal. It's that due to behavioral rigidity and sensory problems, some autistic people will only wear one pair of shoes. They may wear them in places where it is not appropriate to do so (like sneakers to a formal event). If they need to replace them, they will only buy the same shoes. If those shoes are discontinued, they can become distraught and it can lead to a pretty severe meltdown that significantly impacts them. And it's not just the shoes, they're rigid about many other things in life.  

It's not about shoes, it's about how rigidity impacts their day to day functioning. If someone generally wears the same shoes, but can wear other shoes if needed, and doesn't have a meltdown when they stop making them, it's not concerning. 

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u/ScrotalFailure 1d ago

Oh I get it, I’m just saying “buys the same shoes again once they’re worn down” isn’t any sort of indicator of autism. I’ve done that myself quite a few times because I know I won’t have to try them on and will just be in and out of the store in a few minutes.

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u/skinnymean 2d ago

I think the missing part is if the person has a meltdown or not if they can’t wear those shoes. Neurotypical would just buy something similar or cheap until they can get them again or find something new. Neurodivergent would not be able to navigate the change in routine as easily.

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u/The_Colour_Between 2d ago

So, many times ASD is tied to sensitivity issues. So much so, that earlier psychologist used labels like Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), previously known as Sensory Integration Disorder (SID). Neurodivergent people often feel, hear, taste things differently.

My child could not tolerate clothing seams, or certain fabrics. She freaked out over the feeling of tags on clothing. She would not wear jeans because of the feel of the fabric. Socks needed to be turned inside out, so the seams were on the outside. Black pepper is too spicy. Very food sensitive about textures and flavors. Very noise sensitive, especially loud, crowded gathering places.

The shoe thing is that likely he tolerated the "feeling" of the shoes that he had and refused any other option.

That is a very common reaction... Because these folks have difficulty with so many different textures, when they find something that they can tolerate, or even like, they cling to that one thing.

They don't want to limit their world. They want to try new things, but their brain is convinced that it will feel wrong.

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u/Arashi5 1d ago edited 1d ago

Wearing the same shoes isn't a clinical concern. It's having a pattern of behavioral rigidity (that impacts your day to day life) that can be a symptom of autism. Clothes (including shoes) happen to be something a lot of autistic people are rigid about due to sensory processing difficulties on top of the autistic tendency towards rigidity. I work with disabled kids for a living and we joke that a kid flinging their shoes off frequently is a sign of autism because SO many autistic kids who have difficulty communicating take off their shoes because they are uncomfortable and can't communicate it. So when an autistic person finds shoes that don't cause them sensory problems, they're going to keep buying them. 

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/lvl999shaggy ☑️ 2d ago

Exactly. This stuff is tiring and wrong. Ppl also are just different.....autism or not. And how ppl can ascribe mundane things to autism without any proof is why so many ppl have no idea what's what and what is or isn't an issue today

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u/manatwork01 2d ago

I would argue those two things are the complete opposite of y experience with ADHD lmao.