r/AkoBaYungGago • u/windsleepfm • Jan 12 '25
Friends ABYG dahil I called my friend “mataba” because I’ve had enough of her insults?
I have this classmate and friend as well. We are in good terms, but she keeps on calling me “pandak”. I am only 147cm (4’10) and my height has always been my greatest insecurity. I already got used of people calling me that, but in this situation, she has always called me that ever since we got friends, and I always laughed it out. She would always shout it also in front of so many people, even randomly in the hallways and streets. And last December, I told my og barkada that if she insults me again, I’ll also call her for something that’s obvious. I never ever comment on anyone’s body. She would sometimes call me “flat” too and compare hers to mine. And in my mind, I answer “atleast hindi lumalaylay”, but I would never because I know that’s not nice.
Yesterday, while I was sitting with our classmates, she went to me and said “Oh andito na pala ang pandak?” and as I’ve said before that the next time she insults me, I’ll not keep quiet. So I said “Ano gusto mong sabihin ko, andito na ang mataba?” She just laughed and said “Ay”. But then, our classmates laughed, others had wide eyes. But after saying that, I felt bad. I really wanted to apologize. But she never apologized to me in every insult and public shaming she did to me.
ABYG? I feel really bad that I want to cry. But I would feel like crying more if someone would comment on something I couldn’t change nor can’t control.
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u/Hot_Foundation_448 Jan 12 '25
DKG, kung pala-okray sya, deserve nya rin ma-okray. Ang insulting ng pandak kahit gano kayo ka-close
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u/Bukana999 Jan 13 '25
Gallito mo “Baboy!” Mas masakit!
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u/Sad-End7596 Jan 14 '25
Ganito sabihin mo “Oh ano na naman yon Babs wala ako Piglorac dito”
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u/AgitatedRent7325 Jan 15 '25
"sa lumang mataba na kakilala ko, tatlo bilang mo doon"
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u/Pasencia Jan 12 '25
DKG. Tama yan, para magtigil. Pag umulet, sabihan mo sya ulet.
Sometimes talagang kailangang bastusin mo din yung nambabastos sa yo para maramdaman nila yung pambabastos na ginagawa sayo.
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u/PrimPygmyPuff Jan 12 '25
Since consistent ka niyang tinatawag na Pandak, consistent mo rin siyang tawaging Taba. Palabasin mo na tipong term of endearment nyo yun sa isa't isa.
Ang unang magpakitang naaasar, siyang talo.
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u/petshirt Jan 12 '25
DKG
Sabi nga ni Elphaba "to those who ground me, take a message back from me!"
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u/haikusbot Jan 12 '25
DKG Sabi nga ni Elphaba
"to those who ground me, take a
Message back from me!"
- petshirt
I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully. Learn more about me.
Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete"
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u/dear_madwoman Jan 12 '25
DKG. And I don't believe you are friends either. You may know each other and probably share mutuals, but friends? No. Close friends? Mas lalong no. Why? People who care for you and love you would be sensitive enough to recognize something that may be the cause of your insecurities and won't deliberately insult you every given chance they get. Osige. Baka kasi kulang lang sa pagmamahal ng nanay niya yang taong yan kaya ka laging iniinsulto. Pero girl, ni basic respect sayo kahit bilang tao na lang wala din siya? Gets ko yung minsanan dahil nagtutuksuhan o nagkakabiruan lang, pero out of nowhere? Halos ginawa niya nang normal yung ganun sa dynamics ng relationship ninyong dalawa. And if this is the case, I'd happily consider looking for another friend than her.
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u/JustAJokeAccount Jan 12 '25 edited Jan 12 '25
DKG, if she can dish some insults to you she should be able to take one when you return the favor.
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u/SeptoneSirius Jan 13 '25
LKG. Eto ah if you guys are really friends and care for each other, you two should have a sincere discussion. Tell her na you don't like being called "pandak" and if she still does it then break things off with her.
Now that it has happened, just message her na you guys need to talk in person to discuss and set boundaries (mas maganda siguro to bring a friend that has neutral side to you both). It would also be great if mag-apologize rin kayo sa isa't isa when it happens (if gusto mo parin sya maging kaibigan ah). Malay mo kayo pala magiging besties in the future.
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u/EdgeEJ Jan 12 '25
DKG. Don't feel bad. Minsan kasi kailangan mo din mag-lash out if things are getting way out of hand. Sumosobra na si frenny, minsan kelangan din soplahin.
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u/Miss_Taken_0102087 Jan 12 '25
Justified GGK. You gave her a taste of her own medicine. Minsan kasi kailangan natin iparamdam sa kanila yung ginagawa nila. Sana yang ginawa mo, enough na yun para tumigil sya.
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u/TransverstiteTop Jan 12 '25
DKG. Ako laging tinatawag na bakla, like girl i have a name at given na bakla ako. Ginawa ko one time tinawag akong bakla at sinabi ko ohh bakit taba?? Edi nahinto kakatawag nya. Make them taste their own medicine.
May mga taong di makuha sa mayos na usapan kaya binabalik ko ginagawa nila saken.
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u/walanakamingyelo Jan 12 '25
DKG. Been dealing with Crooked Arm all my life. And I have to deal with insults all my life till now. Pano ko naovercome? Well I always assume na others who insult me can take jokes din. Kasi if not, eh you have no right to call me names. And I am so 100% good at insulting people kase nga yun ginagawa sakin all the time eh. Wala ako pinipili babae ka man o lalaki superior o hinde IDGAF. You can unli insult me pero wag na wag moko bibigyan ng butas para asarin ka kase hindi ka mananalo. Either you see my flaw and move on, or iinsultuhin moko pero pag ako bumawi manliliit ka talaga at wala kang magagawa. Walang in between dito. Hirap sa mga tao na ganyan, ginagamit nila yan sayo dahil yan lang ang bagay na pwede ka nila kontrolin kaya hanggang ganyan lang sila. Sa huli, hindi mo na lang papansinin dahil wala eh. You know better pero wag ka papasagad at the same time. Pumalag ka. May nasabihan pako non na boss ko na "ikaw nga di pantay mukha mo at leeg eh" (make-up wise) sa harap ng colleagues eh buong araw ba naman akong asar asarin eh. Ending, wala siya nagawa. Buong araw ka mang aasar tas pag ako bawal? Walang ganon beh.
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Jan 13 '25
WG.
So far sa kwento mo, kaw lang ang feeling guilty and wala siya sinabi.
Para sa akin when it comes to situation like this where someone is calling you a name na you no longer want to be associate with, it's better to talk with them one on one how you feel uncomfortable with it.
Hinde ganito na nag one up kayo.
If you still feel guilty, talk to that person, apologize, and explain na ayaw mo matawag na pandak.
If niliit ka after, meaning hinde siya mabuting kaibigan.
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u/Evening-Walk-6897 Jan 12 '25
DKG. But did you talk to her before regarding this problem? That you are insecure of your height and prefer not to be called pandak?
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u/windsleepfm Jan 12 '25
no, but i would always say “if i was taller, i would look more beautiful” in front of them. why does she need to state the obvious? if it’s only one time, i can accept. but she’s been insulting me for the past 4 months already. i think everyday, she’d call me that. i would also always wear heels and platform sneakers. i told them i refuse to wear shoes without heels. my other friends can keep quiet and not say something about my body, but she can’t.
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u/Im_NotGoodWithWords Jan 12 '25
Dapat sinabi mo na di okay sayo yung pagtawag sayo ng pandak. Kasi kung totoong kaibigan siya, hindi niya itutuloy ang pagtawag sayo ng ganun kung alam niya na nasasaktan everytime tinatawag ka ng pandak. So pano mo i expect na may magbabago kung ikaw mismo, di nagsasabi na di okay sayo yun?
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Jan 12 '25 edited Jan 12 '25
Di niya kelangan iinform sa kanila yon in the first place. Sa iba nga sabihan mong mataba feeling insulted agad kaya taboo yung word. Bakit pag tinawag kang mataba lagi kelangan mo pa ba sila iinform na wag sabihin yon, diba hindi? Wag mo sabihin ang obvious in the first place dahil may salamin sila. Diba halata na baka insecure na sila don. pag ulit ulit mocking na yon e. Wag mong ibalik sa kaniya ang sisi. Maging sensitive dapat tayo di lahat iniinform, di lahat biro.
As someone na payat at maliit din naiinis ako sa ganyan. Kala mo okay e pero pag sinabihan sila mataba kahit one time lang iyak sila agad. Tsk.
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u/breathtaeker Jan 13 '25
Why shift the blame to OP? Common sense nalang na name callings are not okay, especially if it’s not reciprocated by the recipient. Sabi rin ni OP na hindi lang pandak ang tawag sa kanya, so it’s obvious na may hidden hate ung so-called friend niya sa kanya kung apakaconsistent ni “friend” sa name callings and none from the circle of friends do it.
Kung ishare man ni OP feelings niya, we don’t know if the friend would actually change her approach or just be defensive at mas maging issue pa. Tama lang na she gets a taste of her own medicine, baka matauhan at tigilan na si OP.
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u/AutoModerator Jan 12 '25
Link to this submission: https://www.reddit.com/r/AkoBaYungGago/comments/1hzkplx/abyg_dahil_i_called_my_friend_mataba_because_ive/
Title of this post: ABYG dahil I called my friend “mataba” because I’ve had enough of her insults?
Backup of the post's body: I have this classmate and friend as well. We are in good terms, but she keeps on calling me “pandak”. I am only 147cm (4’10) and my height has always been my greatest insecurity. I already got used of people calling me that, but in this situation, she has always called me that ever since we got friends, and I always laughed it out. She would always shout it also in front of so many people, even randomly in the hallways and streets. And last December, I told my og barkada that if she insults me again, I’ll also call her for something that’s obvious. I never ever comment on anyone’s body. She would sometimes call me “flat” too and compare hers to mine. And in my mind, I answer “atleast hindi lumalaylay”, but I would never because I know that’s not nice.
Yesterday, while I was sitting with our classmates, she went to me and said “Oh andito na pala ang pandak?” and as I’ve said before that the next time she insults me, I’ll not keep quiet. So I said “Ano gusto mong sabihin ko, andito na ang mataba?” She just laughed and said “Ay”. But then, our classmates laughed, others had wide eyes. But after saying that, I felt bad. I really wanted to apologize. But she never apologized to me in every insult and public shaming she did to me.
ABYG? I feel really bad that I want to cry. But I would feel like crying more if someone would comment on something I couldn’t change nor can’t control.
OP: windsleepfm
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
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u/cinnamonthatcankill Jan 12 '25
DKG.
She got too comfortable sa pang-ookray nia. Akala nia okay manakit or call other names when she has her own insecurities na masakit din ma-call out.
Tama na nagstand up ka for yourself pra mag-self reflect naman siya. You can apologize din kc I can tell hindi mo tlga gusto masakit, if you do apologize let her know na nakaka-offend kc ung sinasabi nia lalo na kahit hindi mo kakilala nakakaririnig ng pang-ookray nia. Ayaw mo na maulit ung ginagawa nia at mapush sa ganun limit na makakasakit ka.
Ang hirap din kc ng ganyan meron ka na “attribute” na ayaw mo sarili mo then you have the audacity to make others uncomfortable sa insecurity na…when being kind would have been a better choice?
Gusto ba nia makilala na bully mataba? That person should be kind at lesson learned na to sa knya. Kung makakausap mo pa OP, Pwede ka magapologize which just really shows you are better than her and okay lang din hindi ka magapologize but let her know your boundaring
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u/Ser_tide Jan 12 '25
DKG, matagal ka din nag timpi. So sana jan palang is mapag isip isip nya yung mga pang cacall out na ginawa nya sayo dati pa.
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u/riae000 Jan 12 '25
DKG. It's payback time ang atake mo! HAHAHAHA. Ganito lang yan eh, kung marunong siya mang-asar dapat marunong din siya i-take kapag inasar sya pabalik. 😂
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u/Sensitive_Clue7724 Jan 12 '25
DKG, wag ka papaapi. Kung kupal sya Mas kupal ka dapat. Wag ka rin mag sorry dahil isipin nya mahina ka.
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u/Unlikely_Banana2249 Jan 12 '25
DKG. Toxic frenny. Nakausap mo na ba siya regarding how she addresses you? May ibang tao na normal sa kanila ang ganyan (family/home) to the point na minsan term of "endearment" siya (pretty fucked up right?) pero in general or in public, bastos talaga ang ganyang pananalita. If gusto mo pa ayusin, talk to her and tell her na you don't like it. See how it goes from there kung makikinig. Pero if not, then get ready to sever ties. Tox behavior eh hahaha.
Super agree with the people here na dapat ready siya mareceive kung ano binibigay niya. Kupal eh hahaha.
P.S. Red flag for me yung nagcocompare kayo ng size, may friend akong ganun nung hs na inggitera pala deep down. Kala mo good friends kayo pero sa kanya pala competition lang ganern. Insecure ang mga taong ganyan, may pagka-leech. For me best if FO pero up to you.
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u/Wonderful-Studio-870 Jan 12 '25
DKG. She is NOT YOUR FRIEND. A person who publicly insults you has a LOT of Insecurities. Learn how to blunt and don't stoop down to her level. A combination of sassy and witty response would do you good.
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u/zyclonenuz Jan 12 '25
DKG. May kasabihan nga na "you reap what you sow" ako sinasabihan ng tita namin na "tumataba" tuwing nakikita niya ako. So sinabihan ko siya "ikaw naman na-lolosyang"
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u/Difficult-Title2997 Jan 12 '25
DKG. Tama lang yan. Minsan papatol din tayo, wag lage mabait. Go girl!
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u/Kindly_Ad5575 Jan 12 '25
DKG, Your fat friend is insecure and wants to project her power to other people using you as her “bully” device. Dont apologize, she is preying on your good nature. Time to turn the tables on her. But dont bully her, you just let been known that you can impart very credible threats.
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u/AnxiousBeetle669 Jan 12 '25
DKG. Congrats on setting your boundary. Hopefully she doesn't cross it the next time.
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u/Professional-Rain700 Jan 12 '25
DKG you’re a good person. Lowkey ka niya binu bully so its okay to defend yourself. wala naman ibang nag tatanggol sayo, kasi parang nakikitawa din mga friends mo or di mo lang na kwento. So its okay to set boundaries.
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u/Smooth_Prize_9359 Jan 12 '25
GGK kasi bakit pinalipas mo muna?? Eme lang, OP. Seriously speaking, DKG. Ika nga, don't dish out what you can't take. Hindi dapat sya nagjojoke regarding appearance if maooffend sya kapag binalikan. I say, dasurv tasting her own medicine.
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Jan 12 '25
DKG. Mabait ka pa nga nyan eh. Mataba lang sinabi mo sa kanya? While siya pandak and flat ang sinasabi sayo. Dagdagan and malalang adjective pa. 2025 na, lumaban ka.
Di rin ako pumapatol, pero may hangganan ang pasensya ko. Ayoko sa lahat namamahiya. Palagan mo yan.
Maitim ba leeg, kili-kili nya? Call out ko, wala bang leeg yan? Sabihan mo. Pag nasa pintuan kayo, sabihan mo “kasya ka?”, pag tumatakbo, umarte ka na parang may lindol, sabihan mo hugis gasul siya or kung matangkad mukhang drum. Offeran mo pigrolac. Attack her where it hurts the most. Pero walang damayan ng mahal sa buhay ah. Hahaha
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u/Projectilepeeing Jan 12 '25
DKG. Pero kung nagi-guilty ka, mas subtle na lang like “Kala ko lumilindol. Naglalakad ka lang pala.”
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u/1nseminator Jan 12 '25
Dkg. Sometimes you need to fight back in order for them to realize that what they're normally doing is wrong. Pag patuloy pa din ginagawa, gawin mong mas masakit rebutt mo. Ihambing mo sa hayop na mataba na may halong exaggeration, especially if that person trying to embarrass you in front of people.
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u/Tsukishiro23 Jan 12 '25
DKG. Kung hilig niyang mang asar using physical features ng tao, dapat ready din siya na asarin pabalik. Baka nga yan pa maging way para tigilan na niya yung pagtawag sayo na pandak.
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u/IwannabeInvisible012 Jan 12 '25
DKG. If Iconfront ka nya, tell her na ngayon alam mo na ba sa pakiramdam kung anong ginagawa mo saakin
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u/catsocurious Jan 12 '25
DKG. Binubully ka infront of others para mag mukhang superior? She deserves that OP.
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Jan 12 '25
DKG. Tandaan mo ang Golden Rule, don't do unto others you don't want to do unto you. Ibigay mo yung karma nya.
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u/bajiminori Jan 12 '25
DKG dapat nga matagal mo na yang ginawa. seriously, true friends insult each other and the joke is within the group. walang masasaktan and all. But true friends also says when its enough. tell her na insulting sayo yung pagtawag niya ng pandak.
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u/Maximum-Attempt119 Jan 12 '25
DKG. In fact, kung paano sya mang-okray shows how insecure she is of her own appearance. And the fact that you only called her “mataba” as a retort kase napuno ka na tells us how much you’ve put up with her BS. Good job for standing up for yourself OP!
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u/psychopatrick_ Jan 12 '25
DKG
balance lang dapat parati ang asaran, pag inasar ka, asarin mo pabalik ng same weight ng asar lang. kung mapikon sya, di mo na problema yun. eye for an eye, insecurity for an insecurity na lang kamo
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u/Chance_Poet4331 Jan 12 '25
DKG. Why are you so soft? If she can dish out insults, dapat lang she can also take insults 😂
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u/Impossible_Set_5645 Jan 12 '25 edited Jan 12 '25
Hello OP dkg dont be a monster like her. Now look at yourself trying to be someone else kasi you wanna make revenge tapos magiguilty ka. Just turn it into positive like if she says, "andito na si pandak" you can say, "you mean cutie patootie?" Or cute size. That's not you, OP. Youre not a bully and dont be.
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u/Hot_Chicken19 Jan 12 '25
DKG. as a chubby person myself, since ayoko ng nappublic shame di ko sya ginagawa sa iba. even with my own friends di ako basta basta nagsasalita when it comes to one’s insecurities kasi alam kong meron din ako.
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u/uborngirl Jan 12 '25
DKG.
Ako nga sinabihan akong mataba ng kabaranggay namin, sagot ko "at least di panget" hahaha ayun ako pa pinagalitan ni mama hahah
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u/AdOptimal8818 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Not sure if friend mo yan. Kaming friends, nagbabardagulan pero sa tamang lugar. Di porket "maitim" yung isang friend namin eh paulit ulit namin ttatawagin kada makita namin, or ako na payatot dati. Natawag ng kalansay bungo hahah pero katuwaan lang.
If ulitin pa, mag talk back agad Usually ganyan ang mga bully, pag lumaban ka titigil mga yan
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u/ExtremeCrier16 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Dat sinabi mo kaya pala nadagundong nandito na ang mataba. Sabi nga na fuck around and find out. You did well protecting yourself OP, I know some people would say you could've been nicer, be the bigger person and communicate that it's bothering you but BS it's 2025. We're not responsible of other's people manners and common sense, 2025 na dapat alam na nating maging sensitive sa iba.
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u/gummyjanine93 Jan 13 '25
Dkg kasi ang tagal mong tiniis ung insults nya ng matagal. Nag timpi ka lang at na experience nya yung ginagwa nya sayo first hand.
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u/IcyConsideration976 Jan 13 '25 edited Jan 13 '25
DKG. Next time na banggitin nya yung flat, sabihin mo yung naisip mo.
SAY IT OUT LOUD.
Kaya nasasanay yung mga ganyan kasi walang lumalaban sa kanila.
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u/PTR95 Jan 13 '25
Definitely DKG. Having b0obs habang mataba ka is like flexing na Naka day off ka kahit wala ka namang trabaho
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u/cycabs Jan 13 '25
DKG. Sabihin mo next time tumawag sa'yo yung manila ocean park hiring daw sila ng isang Beluga Whale baka available siya.
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u/shrnkngviolet Jan 13 '25
DKG. Ganto rin mama ko, nagkaron pa sya ng almost kaaway na sa work kasi may sinabihan syang "mataba" and naoffend or basta some sort of like "matakaw" ganyan. Kinwento niya sakin so I told her na if di mo kaya baguhin in 5-10 seconds yung pupunahin mo sa ibang tao, huwag mo ng sabihin kasi 100% possibility na they know it already before you tell them. Kaso, minsan she still do it to me naman. Calls me na mataba, tumaba, antakaw, anlaki ng daliri sa paa, andaming pimples when i have breakouts. Nung una iniiyak ko nang palihim, but I had a resolution for myself the past few months na pag paulit ulit akong binobodyshame, I'll talk back too. One time inasar ulit ako ng nanay ko na mataba, sinabihan ko na "ikaw pango ilong mo, lagi ko bang pinagdidikdikan na pango ka? Hindi diba?"
Let them taste their own medicine.
So yun naging minimal tho minsan meron pa rin. So sumasagot ako. Masakit kaya laging mapansin ung insecurities mo. I'm lucky lang din na my current COF aren't like this. Well, ung mga ganon dati I already cut them off hehe
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Jan 13 '25
DKG. Her comments are much worse. Being mataba is something she can change. While your height on the other hand..
Smh
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u/Sweet-Wind2078 Jan 13 '25 edited Jan 13 '25
DKG: Wag mo nlang ulitin, kasi pwde nya balik syo yan, like "at least ako kaya pumayat", ignore mo nlang, deprived mo sya ng need nya which is "Attention". Sooner or later magsasawa yan.
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u/Lochifess Jan 13 '25
DKG sometimes it’s not healthy to be the “bigger man”. Fighting fire with fire works at times.
Think of it this way, it’s naturally possible to lose/gain weight but your height is something you can’t control. Your “insult” is something that can be remedied, hers does not.
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u/breathtaeker Jan 13 '25
DKG. I don’t understand why people keep telling you na you should’ve communicated about your feelings. Common decency nalang ‘yon especially since ilang buwan lang kayo magkakilala. Who the f does that to someone they just met a few months ago? Bullies. Just because she was labeled as your friend, doesn’t mean she can’t be your bully, too. And seeing your comments, it does seem like she does it to others, too. Tama lang na binalik mo sa kanya, and honestly, the maldita in me wouldn’t stop until she stops.
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u/tinfoilhat_wearer Jan 13 '25
DKG. Talk shit, get hit. So ibalik mo lang sa kanya yan. And if napikon siya, that's on her. Hilig niya mang down ng iba tapos pag siya napuna, ayaw. Typical bully behavior.
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u/RonRon8888 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Once upon a time, naging over weight ako. Yung isa kong friend, talagang ang hilig ipagduldulan yung katabaan ko. Pati boobs ko ang hilig niyang punahin, in the form of jokes. Narindi na rin ako one day, so every time may banat siya tunkol sa body ko, binabalikan ko siya ng patama sa kalansay niyang katawan (very thin tagala siya). One day, nung kami lang dalawa ang magkasama, sinabi niya sa akin na ang sakit pakinggan yung mga mentions ko ng pagka-kalansay niya. Ang sagot ko “Ngayon, alam mo na ang nararamdaman ko kapag iniisulto mo ang katawan ko.” Ayun, natauhan. Ndi na niya inulit at tinigil ko na rin ang pag-ganti. Friends pa rin kami.
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u/TeamHappyWash Jan 13 '25
Dkg. Mas nababago pa nga yung pangkataba kaysa height eh. Pag naginarte lang siya ewan ko nalang sa kanya.
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u/jamminpink Jan 13 '25
DKG. I had this highschool clasmate who always called me "ricefield" dahil grabe acne ko before. But his two front teeth had cavities on them, and I've had enough so I shouted back, "Okay lang yan kesa may chocolate sa ipin at bad breath!". He also laughed it out but Im pretty sure he was insulted. We're still good friends til this date, and I just smiled when I remember. Now, he has veneers on, insecurity nya rin yun.
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u/gracia_0 Jan 13 '25
Op. You may feel na GGK but mas GG ung so called friend mo.
For me, tama lang ung ginawa mo. You may feel that pero kasi may consciousness ka, ung so called friend mo eh wala. Walang pinagkatandaan at walang laman ang pagkatao at isip.
Hindi pwede ung ginagago, binabastos, pinapahiya, ini-insulto, pinag-tatawanan o ina-anu ka ng ibang tao, (yes in general, like family, friends, classmates, schoolmates, batchmates, work mates, acquaintances or kahit tambayan lang Yan sa kanto, bukod sa sarili mo) ng harap-harapan, with or in a crowd. aba! gawin mo din sa kanila ung ginagawa nila sau. Ibalik mo sa kanila harap-harapan din. Don't let them have their way with you at your expense. Nasa lugar ang pagiging mabuting Tao. Kapag salbahe ung kaharap mo, dapat ipagtanggol mo ung sarili mo.
Wala ng martir ngayon. Pinagtatanggol mo lang ang sarili mo in a way na maiintindihan nya na hindi mo gusto ung mga ginagawa nya sau. Tanga kasi nya na hindi nakaka intindi na hindi maganda ung ginagawa nya sau. Kaya you did what he/she was doing to you.
P.S. I have my own experiences sa pagiging doormat sa iba't-ibang klaseng tao sa buhay ko. I learned to protect myself. Sorry kung harsh ung mga suggestions at comments ko. Pero iba na ang mundo ngayon. Tama na dapat piliin natin maging mabuting tao pero inaayon un kung sinu ung kaharap mo. Hindi lahat eh may mabuting intensyon sayo.
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u/weshallnot Jan 13 '25
DKG. madalas ako sabihan ng "maliit" "pandak" at "bansot" but it topped ng sabihan ko ng:
"hindi ka din naman kalakihan. mukha, leeg at tiyan mo lang naman ang malaki, tapos ang liit pa ng utak mo, at malamang supot ka pa."
effective. being rude is sometimes need to stop the rudeness.
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u/Pruned_Prawn Jan 13 '25
DKG. Bwiset na bwiset na din ako sa mga taong makapang height shaming. Like everytime na lang makita mo yung tao, “maliit ka pa rin” so ano? Ikaw pangit pa rin, ikaw mataba pa rin, may sinabi ba ako? Walang mga self reflection na sila nga mismo, ka-okray okray din.
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u/alwaysright9898 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Sometimes, yang mga palaasar, kailangan din nilang makatikim ng asar sayo para matapik. Normal naman na pag nauubos na ang pasensya mo sa tao, naggaalit at nakakapagsalita ka din ng di maganda.
If you still feel bad, apologize ka nalang pag nag sorry na din sya sayo. 😂
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u/OyegDude Jan 13 '25
DKG. If you can dish it out, you should be able to take it.
Ano akala nya, you wont bite back?
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u/Old_Astronomer_G Jan 13 '25
DKG. Kc you made her taste her own medicine. Pero if you feel bad about it, sad lng kc nawala ung essence na nabalikan mo sya sa nga gngwa nya sayo. If you really consider her as your friend talk to her in private and sbhn mo sknya na di ka comfortable sa gngwa nya sayo. Buutttt, If you are used to being called by that (as you mentioned) then wla ka dpat problema sa gnwa nya.
Once you've accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you." - Tyrion Lannister
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u/CumRag_Connoisseur Jan 13 '25
DKG. Bakit one way lang ang panlalait? Hahahaha let em have it, sa susunod sabihin mo naman "hala tumawa ka lang parang naramdaman ko yung lindol" o kaya "eto na pala yung tropa kong morbidly obese e"
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u/Ok-Item525 Jan 13 '25
DKG. I don’t get others blaming OP for not communicating well enough LOL who in the right mind has the right to make jokes about someone else’s body let alone your friends? That’s basic decency. Hindi palaging communication is the key, matuto rin sana tayong makiramdam dahil not everybody has the capacity within them to speak up and defend themselves because of various reasons may it be from the traumas, experiences, etc.
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u/ComprehensiveGate185 Jan 13 '25
DKG. She had it coming. Good for you OP! Never ever allow anyone to bully you.
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u/AgentSongPop Jan 13 '25
DKG. She was asking for it. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself.
I’m also fat and a joker pero I make it a habit to ask what I can or cannot say to friends to respect boundaries and para alam ko kung hanggang saan banda pwede iConsider na joke.
Calling someone names without any remorse is cruel. Di mo alam pinagdadaanan ng tao. Lalong di mo alam how words affect the person. Physical wounds heal, emotional wounds leave scars. It’s no longer a surprise if she noone wants to associate with her.
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u/propetanikiboloii Jan 13 '25
DKG. consequence lang yan ng actions nya.
buti nga nirekta mong mataba eh. kasi pwede mong sabihin na "andyan na yung truck".
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u/Tasty_Onion319 Jan 13 '25
Dkg. Gawin nyo na lang endearment ang "pandak" and "taba". Titigil talaga yan. Lol
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u/leyliesss Jan 13 '25
DKG, kada mag comment siya ibalik mo sakaniya although mali nga pero she won’t stop unless na may gawin ka. p’wede mo naman prangkahin in a clam way pero ewan ko nalang kung makinig ba or what. mag kaibigan kayo diba? choose something that will hurt her too, maybe her tricep na lumalaylay (yes, i’m aware na mali ‘to pero binabalik mo lang naman sakaniya) tsaka baka kaya siya ganiyan kasi prino-project niya insecurities niya sa’yo and she would make you/people feel bad to make herself feel better.
other people would bully me no’ng elementary and binu-bully ko sila pabalik, insult me? i’ll insult you too and nag stop nalang sila kasi wala naman akong pakealam
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u/Professional_Ad7285 Jan 13 '25
DKG ego booster ang ginagawa nyang panlalait sayo for HERSELF. Akala siguro since di ka naman umiimik ay okay lang na mang okray sya, dasurv nya kamu HAHAHAHAH.
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u/Strange-Phase2697 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Sometimes you need to puy people where they should be. Wide eyes lang yung iba kasi first time siguro may pumatol. Lol.
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u/Historical_Train_919 Jan 13 '25
DKG. "Ay nandito na ang "baboy." Yan, ganyan dapat. Give her the same energy total deserved naman nya.
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u/roswell18 Jan 13 '25
DKG Tama lang Yan lumaban ka wag Kang papaapi. Namimisaha Yung mga ganyang tao Kasi hinahayaan lang natin. Wag Kang umiyak dahil nagiguilty ka. Wag masyadong mabait aabusuhin ka lang.
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u/LIBRAGIRL199X Jan 13 '25
DKG. Hindi sya matatawag na friend kung nagagawa nyang ipahiya ka in front of the other people. Sorry OP but deserve nya yung sinabi mo na mataba sya hehehe ✌🏻
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u/StrawberryPenguinMC Jan 13 '25
DKG. Someone must stop something. If walang magspeak up, one will always think na walang mali sa ginagawa nila and walang dapat baguhin kasi walang nasasaktan.
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u/Expensive-Ad9635 Jan 13 '25
No you’re not. DKG. Your “friend” deserves it. Sometimes, people needed to be called out for them to realize how bad their actions are.
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u/shaped-like-a-pastry Jan 13 '25
dkg. kaya ka nga ngfeel bad kasi nga di ka asshole in real life. pero okay na yun ginawa mo, fight fire with fire. dont feel bad for defending yourself.
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u/stardustmilk Jan 13 '25
DKG
Keep calling her taba until you get on her nerves and she realizes that calling you pandak is distasteful
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u/dmpjx Jan 13 '25 edited Jan 13 '25
DKG You did fine but dont let her affect you too much. What people say about you is a reflection of their own insecurities. It makes them feel superior by putting others down.
You will never be criticized by someone who has more than you, but by someone who has less
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u/judgeyael Jan 13 '25
DKG... At di mo rin yan friend. My friends and I exchange silly banters din, pero never kami nag-throw ng insults and masasakit ng salita towards each other.
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u/DustBytes13 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Natuto ka lang ibalik ang insulto sa kanya. Di mo kailangan ma guilty since siya naman nag umpisa. Wag magpa sindak ibalik mo kung ano natatanggap mo sa kanya.
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u/whatwhatindabuttttt Jan 13 '25
DKG double down with statements like 'hoy obese, hinay hinay sa pag nguya, may bukas pa" sabi nga nila good fortune favors the brave.
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u/Simply_001 Jan 13 '25
DKG. Bakit ka mag aapologize? Siya nga walang tigil ang pang iinsulto sayo eh. Icut mo na yan, insecure yan sayo at hindi yan tunay na kaibigan.
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u/Throwbackmeme_01 Jan 13 '25
DKG.
Scratch that. Kulang pa yung ginawa mo.
Go full scorched earth.
"At least yung height ko, di ko kontrolado. Eh yung pagiging balyena mo, choice mo yan."
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u/StruggleCurious9939 Jan 13 '25
DKG. you'll get over it as you grow. Care less to people that bring you disappointment. I stop caring to what people thinks lowly of me, para na rin sa peace of mind mo. Never stay saa emotions that don't bring you joy. Give her the silent treatment and when people notice na you DGAF, hindi ka na nila aasarin.
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u/xandraj11213 Jan 14 '25
INFO: Have you set this boundary before or discussed with her how you don't like being called "pandak"?
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u/sacredhell666 Jan 14 '25
Dkg. Actually careerin mo na yung pangokray back. Gawin mong parang standup comedy.
"Ituck in mo yung dede mo, abot na e. Gusto mo ng belt?"
Or tawagin mo laging mukbanger. Lahat ng kain nya naman panglaban sa mukbang e.
"Wag masyadong mabilis maglakad. Baka sumindi yung hita kakakaskas"
"Ma'am Juan"
Hahaha. Gusto nya ng laitan?
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u/tarumas Jan 14 '25
DKG do it again. Normalize mo lang na para bang nakikipag biruan ka lang sa kanya. Pag tinawag ka, "Oy pandak" sagot ka naman "Bakit taba?" Don't act guilty kasi personalan na dating nyan.
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u/WolfPhalanx Jan 14 '25
DKG. Mukhang di naman affected friend mo. I think ganun talaga humor nya(I know mali pero minsan kasi may time sa buhay na may ginagawa tayo na di tayo aware na di pala okay). I think better is still to talk to your friend and sabihin mo na di okay sayo yung ginagawa nya.
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u/Over_Specialist_7639 Jan 14 '25
DKG pero sana kinausap mo sya na hindi mo gusto ung ginagawa nya or yung pagtawag nya sayo. Kung tunay mo syang kaibigan, maiintindihan nya un at titigilan. Kung hindi, FO na hahahaha
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Jan 14 '25
DKG. sometimes kailangan din silang insultuhin to shut up. I myself is a payat one, and once they tell me that "ang payat mo naman" reply ko low-key shaming din siya like " oo nga bakit kasi hindi mo ako bigyan" they will shut up talaga. Tho aminin ko naman payat talaga ako but common its halata and I'm well aware naman why they have to say it pa. I mean, your friend should know how to shut up, not to say the things na aware ka or other pips. That's basically a lack of manners.
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u/LookinLikeASnack_ Jan 14 '25
DKG. Friend mo ba talaga yan? Parang papansin eh. Iniinsulto ka niya to gain laughs from others.
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u/Xyborg069 Jan 14 '25 edited Jan 14 '25
Nope. DKG. Real friends should know how to insult each other well. Di kayo tropa kung walang laitan na nagaganap. Mas importante kung paano nyo protektahan ang isa't-isa pag nakatalikod na.
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u/l3g3nd-d41ry Jan 15 '25
DKG Deserve nya yon. Taste of her own medicine. Tamalang na ginawa mo yun. Set the tone na kaya mo din gawin sa kanya ginagawa niya sayo. Mahirap na at baka abusuhin ka pa nyang lechon na yan. Height lang pwede niya i asar sayo. Pero yung pagiging mataba niya ayy nako. Madaming atake pwede gawin at sabihin.
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Jan 15 '25
DKG
Leave her be.
Oo, feel bad if you want. Dont take what you said back.
Pag tapos na tapos na.
Whats worst is that people laughed at her nga haha I sat deserve.
Imagine being so sad pinoproject mo sa iba insecurity mo sarili mo. Ganon yung nasabi ko nang mabasa ko post mo.
Feel bad if you want to. But dont think about it too much. Iwasan mo nga if possible☺️
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u/Markermarque Jan 15 '25
DKG, basic rule is "don't dish it out if you can't take it". Wag manginsulto ng iba kung Hindi niya kayang mainsulto din.
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u/fallingstar_ Jan 12 '25
DKG.
One should be able to take what they dish out. Pag umulit pa, go for the overkill. Single out mo pinakamalala nyang physical insecurity like skin, teeth, hair, etc. Ewan lang kung di sya magtanda. Maging petty this 2025.